SailorDione (ghostbandicoot)
if you dont like enya youre wrong   United States
 
 
just get me to FFS, SRS, and fix my voice. yay dysphoria XP

highly sensitive person or totally fucking numb depending on the moment

violet evergarden's way of helping people is aspirational

current game goals:
-top 50,000 osu
-get to 98% overall accuracy osu
-kinda burnt out on overwatch and dont see a lot of difference between ranks (ranking system kinda broken, not just an excuse but kindof an excuse)

current life goals:
-job
-continue transition

violet evergarden/transistor/seapunk/hobbits&elves is my make-believe (if i had moneys) aesthetic most of the time
Currently Online
Screenshot Showcase
about me because whatever
neurotic AF maybepsychoticxp

interests: art, media, vegan foods (im failing at being vegan), other living beings that feel pain/suffer (plants know theyre being eaten but do they feel pain) :ROTTR_hunter::bird::ABZU_Fish::acleap::insectswarm::ThreeTrees::jera: i made some pretty good vegan phở, pretty proud of myself. now to find a way to live on my own fml

feeling nothing when i look at/listen to art sux. not understanding social interactions at times or overanalyzing the shit out of them and feeling detached sucks. that's some dissociation/depersonalization/derealization for ya and i have it in spades.

language: english, learning japanese like a grade A weeabo and stuff--till i broke my phone, now i cant learn japanese with those helpful apps. want to be a polyglot (always thought it was polygot) but too lazy and too old probly

politics n views: trans-inclusionary feminism, am conscious of evo-psych perspective/red-pill perspective tho i disagree largely with it, centrism/liberal/anarchist/communal/socialistic values, commerce is great but the social distance capitalism encourages bothers me, shits complicated and im filled with hate at politics :meh_face: im basically an egghead: "...A person of spurious intellectual pretensions, often a professor or the protégé of a professor. Essentially confused in thought and immersed in mixture of sentimentality and violent evangelism. A doctrinaire supporter of Middle-European socialism as opposed to Greco-French-U.S. ideas of democracy and liberalism. Subject to the old-fashioned philosophical morality of Nietzsche which frequently leads him into jail or disgrace. A self-conscious prig, so given to examining all sides of a question that he becomes thoroughly addled while remaining always in the same spot. An anemic bleeding heart."
[ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Egghead , on what the definition of egghead more or less would be according to an author]

religion: likes most of the values of jainism. buddhism has lots of good thought too. raised christian, turned agnostic. christianity is real patriarchal in historical context. all religions have some good values though, but religion pisses me off because of its stranglehold on free thought.

mental health: not so good. broke down mentally in year 3 of college, realized bottled-up emotional immaturity is detrimental to my enjoyment of life, and never been the same since. fml, depression, generalized and social anxiety (even online):sb_turtle:, dissociation, gender dysphoria, body dysmorphia, eating and sleeping disregulation, motivation/determination lacking, struggling to care enough to get healthy and be level with people (and dogs and cats and such) because im not consistently passionate enough about anything to do anything for a long time :teleport:

gender: transitioning to girl and overcompensating with pink-ness, struggling to acknowledge myself as a bonafide real girl. the body hate is real, too real :cubecry:

not often a self-abashed 猫 :shelterfox: nya :Neko:

mood: :melopink: i become a copycat around other people these days in more ways than one. feeling like faceless from spirited away and hating my lack of a self

music: varies. darkside, bonobo black sands, emancipator at the moment. snowy cold a e s t h e t i c

life goals: get to GM in overwatch as widowmaker/ana (pharah/tracer/dva/mercy).
get a job i like, stop being NEET leech, live on my own, get over my childish traumas, find someone to never let go of/never be let go of. sometimes i think being a teacher would be good because im comfortable in the school environment's structure and order, but also uncomfortable with it. plus idk, idk what the fuck to do with my life. too pessimistic these days, but cant find anything that holds my interests/passion.
Achievement Showcase
396
Achievements
4
Perfect Games
31%
Avg. Game Completion Rate
B17G Jan 2 @ 7:39am 
*pokes forehead*
Jambo Dec 25, 2017 @ 9:27pm 
(Sorry, comment was too long so Steam made me split it)
It seems like it's a mechanism of nature to be sure that there's always someone who's gonna make it and someone who's gonna really nail it (if proper conditions are given), Dandelions are more likely to make it whatever the conditions but are not able to fully take advantage of the best circumstances, like the Orchids do.
If an Orchid is not lucky with the given circumstances, bad luck.
How cruelly ironic can Nature be.


Maybe, and just maybe, this could help you a bit to understand yourself better.

Sorry for the long post. Not meant to annoy you.
Jambo Dec 25, 2017 @ 9:26pm 
Hello, I stood upon your profile from the Transgender group, while reading some of the "introduce yourself" posts I had unread.

I found I can relate to many of your sentences from your presentation and here on your profile.

Then I came to the realization that maybe you're (and maybe you're not aware of it) an Orchid Child (not only relates to children, it's called that but it's something that encompasses the whole life of the person) . While the name may be missleading it's not about otherworldly crap. It's an actual term used for a certain variation of some gene (which name I don't remember, sorry) found not long ago thanks to the Dunedin study (if I remember well).

Basically, the Orchid people, under proper circumstances, bloom more brightly than their counterparts (the Dandelion Children), but , under stressful, tough conditions they suffer more and are less able to withstand and overcome the difficulties, specially on their own.
gui Feb 21, 2017 @ 10:58am 
^^
ShinyDark Oct 31, 2016 @ 5:48pm 
but don't they look...cute?
ShinyDark Oct 31, 2016 @ 3:30pm 
a skeleton doesn't even have a stomach, thus i have nothing to fear :p