Philomaeus
Philomaeus   Texas, United States
Level
158
Decus Romanum
100 XP
 
 
Romanist • Classicist • Philomath • Fervid Bibliophile • Neoplatonist

"My sticky paws were into making straws out of big fat slurpy treats" <3

"Any man may earn, through skill and courage, a single favour,
If he will face the fear of the Ancient City,
And slay the four great guardians who have stolen our citadel."

"Our hero stands before the gods, and asks that if he fulfills their quest, he will join them as an equal."

"Only the hope of the hero's failure comforts them."

"The Warrior departs for the City of Legends, preparing to carve one more story upon its walls."

- Gods
View more info
Currently Offline
Profile Awards  10
Badges  361
Games  594
Inventory   
Screenshots  10
Artwork  39
Groups  50
The Western Roman Empire
193 Members
Metal!
19,906 Members
Furries United
11,780 Members
Friends  12
61
Matthew
Offline
52
Karter Blackpaw
In non-Steam game
48
Whithy
Offline
36
Goat Leg
Offline
23
Pasta Pandemonium
Online
20
GO! GO! ZEPPELI!
Online
Achievement Showcase
28,190
Achievements
29
Perfect Games
47%
Avg. Game Completion Rate
Artwork Showcase
Glory to the Emperor
14
+ 36
"Non Nobis Solum Nati Sumus"
Edit Preference settings, or click the little box in the top-right corner of the image to remove blur if you have difficulty viewing my artwork.

"When the world is at peace, a gentleman keeps his sword by his side." - Wu Tsu

"Roman, remember by your strength to rule
Earth's peoples—for your arts are to be these:
To pacify, to impose the rule of law,
To spare the conquered, battle down the proud."

― Anchises, The Aeneid (6.1151-1154)

"Young Romulus
Will take the leadership, build walls of Mars,
And call by his own name his people Romans.
For these I set no limits, world or time,
But make the gift of empire without end."

― Pronouncement of Jupiter, The Aeneid (1.371-375)

"For Attic phrase in Plato let them seek,
I poach in Suidas for unlicens'd Greek."

― Alexander Pope, The Dunciad (4.227-8)

"My son, ask for thyself another kingdom.
For that which I leave is too small for thee."

— Philip II Macedon

"To the Elysian plain… where life is easiest for men. No snow is there, nor heavy storm, nor ever rain, but ever does Ocean send up blasts of the shrill-blowing West Wind that they may give cooling to men."

— Homer, Odyssey

"A Phrygian King had bound a chariot yoke
And Alexander cut the 'Gordian knot'
And legend said that who untied the knot
He would become the master of Asia"

— Iron Maiden, Alexander the Great


Nigh is the time of the Sword and Axe. Nigh is the time of Madness and Disdain.

:Helmet2: I'm just your typical rodent Furry trash nerd with a penchant for History spanning from Antiquity into the Contemporary.
With a particular passion for anything relating to Greco-Roman history and culture.

:Helmet2: You may refer to me by my primary username: Philomaeus/Philo.
Which, as a Greek name is pronounced: "Fi-low-may-us" .
Or by my personal name: Matthew/Matt.
I'm not a picky fellow. So feel free to call me whatever you want!

:Helmet2: I thoroughly enjoy meeting friendly folk and new faces.
So feel free to drop a comment or send a friend request, and chances are I'll gladly accept you into my little slice of Steam.

:Helmet2: For those who want to add me on Discord. My ID is: Philomaeus#0562
Feel free to send me an invite anytime.

:Helmet2: My Telegram contact for those interested is: https://t.me/Philomaeus

Though, fair warning that I am much more active on Steam, and easier to get a hold of if I am in-game!


╔═╦╗╔╦═╦═╦╗╔╗ Put This On
║═╣║║║╔╣╔╣╚╝║ Your Steam ID
║╔╣╚╝║║║║╚╗╔╝ If you Are Or
╚╝╚══╩╝╚╝    ╚╝       Support Furries!   
Item Showcase
Game Collector
594
Games Owned
728
DLC Owned
314
Wishlisted
Featured Games
Items Up For Trade
2,573
Items Owned
45
Trades Made
6,310
Market Transactions
"Biggus Dickus"

Life of Brian

Scene 13: What's So Funny About Biggus Dickus?



PONTIUS PILATE: ...Make one large living awea. Ahh.

CENTURION: Hail Caesar.

PILATE: Hail.

CENTURION: Only one survivor, sir.

PILATE: Ah. Thwow him to the floor.

CENTURION: What, sir?

PILATE: Thwow him to the floor.

CENTURION: Ah.

whump

BRIAN: Aagh!

PILATE: Hmm. Now, what is your name, Jew?

BRIAN: 'Brian', sir.

PILATE: 'Bwian', eh?

BRIAN: No, no. 'Brian'.

slap

Aah!

PILATE: Hoo hoo hoo ho. The little wascal has spiwit.

CENTURION: Has what, sir?

PILATE: Spiwit.

CENTURION: Yes. He did, sir.

PILATE: No, no. Spiwit, siw. Um, bwavado. A touch of dewwing-do.

CENTURION: Oh. Ahh, about eleven, sir.

PILATE: So, you dare to waid us.

BRIAN: To what, sir?

PILATE: Stwike him, Centuwion, vewy woughly!

slap

BRIAN: Aaah!

CENTURION: Oh, and, uh, throw him to the floor, sir?

PILATE: What?

CENTURION: Thwow him to the floor again, sir?

PILATE: Oh, yes. Thwow him to the floor, please.

BRIAN: Aah!

whump

PILATE: Now, Jewish wapscallion.

BRIAN: I'm not Jewish. I'm a Roman.

PILATE: A Woman?

BRIAN: No, no. Roman.

slap

Aah!

PILATE: So, your father was a Woman. Who was he?

BRIAN: He was a centurion in the Jerusalem Garrisons.

PILATE: Weally? What was his name?

BRIAN: 'Nortius Maximus'.

CENTURION: Ahh, ha ha!

PILATE: Centuwion, do we have anyone of that name in the gawwison?

CENTURION: Well, no, sir.

PILATE: Well, you sound vewy sure. Have you checked?

CENTURION: Well, no, sir. Umm, I think it's a joke, sir,... like, uh, 'Sillius Soddus' or... 'Biggus Dickus', sir.

GUARD #4: chuckling

PILATE: What's so... funny about 'Biggus Dickus'?

CENTURION: Well, it's a joke name, sir.

PILATE: I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.

GUARD #4: chuckling

PILATE: Silence! What is all this insolence? You will find yourself in gladiator school vewy quickly with wotten behavior like that.

BRIAN: Can I go now, sir?

slap

Aaah! Eh.

PILATE: Wait till Biggus Dickus hears of this.

GUARD #4: chuckling

PILATE: Wight! Take him away!

CENTURION: Oh, sir, he-- he only--

PILATE: No, no. I want him fighting wabid, wild animals within a week.

CENTURION: Yes, sir. Come on, you.

GUARD #4: Ha ha haa ha, ha ha ha. Hooo hooo hoo hoo. Hoo hoo...

PILATE: I will not have my fwiends widiculed by the common soldiewy. Anybody else feel like a little... giggle... when I mention my fwiend... Biggus...

GUARD #1: chuckling

PILATE: ...Dickus?

GUARD #1: chuckling

PILATE: What about you? Do you find it... wisible... when I say the name... 'Biggus'...

GUARD #3: chuckle

PILATE: ...'Dickus'?

GUARD #1 and GUARD #2: chuckling

PILATE: He has a wife, you know. You know what she's called? She's called... 'Incontinentia'. 'Incontinentia Buttocks'.

GUARDS: laughing

PILATE: Stop! What is all this?

GUARDS: Ha, ha ha ha ha ha...

PILATE: I've had enough of this wowdy webel sniggewing behavior. Silence! Call yourselves Pwaetowian guards? You're not-- Seize him! Seize him! Blow your noses and seize him!
Badge Collector
361
Total Badges Earned
56
Foil Badges Earned
515
Game Cards
Favorite Group
The Waffle Philosophers - Public Group
We carry the Wisdom of the Almighty Waffle...
118
Members
2
In-Game
26
Online
2
In Chat
Salien Stats
Steam Summer Saliens 2018
Level Reached
4
Bosses Fought
1

Experience Earned
8,775
Favorite Game
Shadow Warrior Classic Redux
49
Hours played
20
Achievements
Shadow Dragon
100 XP
Achievement Progress   20 of 20
+15
Favorite Guide
Legendary Eastern Roman Empire Tips
Created by - Antonius1871
25 ratings
Total War: ATTILA
Updated: effectiv and cheap eastern roman empire army Here is some advices and information to win as the Eastern Roman Empire campaign in legendary. It is not the only way to reach victory and probably not the best one, but it was enough for me to archieve
Workshop Showcase
Roman Expansion
This mod adds new units to the game for the Roman factions. I tried to make them historically accurate, studying descriptions and appearance from various sources available on the Internet. Some units will also strengthen the garrisons of the Roman factions
307 ratings
Total War: ATTILA
Created by - Apis in Memphis and Andrew Boyarsky
Recent Activity
15.6 hours past 2 weeks
25 hrs on record
last played on May 25
Warhammer 40,000: Boltgun
Achievement Progress   10 of 21
+5
32 hrs on record
last played on Apr 21
Painkiller Hell & Damnation
Bug Smasher
100 XP
Achievement Progress   54 of 107
+49
3.8 hrs on record
last played on Mar 25
Painkiller: Recurring Evil
Comments
Goat Leg Mar 13 @ 7:54pm 
An actual unique profile! Love the Roman theming! When in Rome get caught in the Rat Trap!
Goomi Feb 6 @ 6:39pm 
dude the art is dope asf
TiddyM I L K Jan 18 @ 10:42pm 
love the artwork
Philomaeus Jan 5 @ 12:35pm 
Back from vacation, guys~ :Furrowed:
Karter Blackpaw Oct 22, 2023 @ 6:46am 
Wake the ♥♥♥♥ up, Samurai. We're out of Early Access.
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠄⠄⣠⣶⣷⣦⣠⡄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡻⠟⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⢉⠁⠄⠚⠙⠻⢿⢿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣃⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠳⠃⡏⠈⢙⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠯⠄⠓⣤⣦⡶⢿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄⡜⠄⠄⠌⡫⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡣⠁⠄⠄⠋⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢣⢍⠄⠄⠄⠆⣿
⣿⣿⠛⠛⠉⠙⢂⣠⡖⡀⠄⠓⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢐⣾⣷⡀⠄⠄⠘⠄⣿
⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡝⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣧⡀⠄⠄⢀⢿⣿
⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠁⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣿⡂⠄⠁⠄⠈⣿:
Crusader21 Apr 17, 2023 @ 1:38am 
ur mom is kringe