Bliztank |
Alexander   Virginia, United States
always trust no one, except for the guy telling you not to trust others
you can trust that guy because he's telling you
two paths unfold before your eyes, roll for wisdom

i diagnose you with pluto brain (inverse of galaxy brain!!)
i played highlander in five regions at once, beware.
fortune to those whom dare

[6:10 AM]
yeah that sounds confusing as ♥♥♥♥

Imagine some d&d esque quest and there's just a moderately threatening place known as
"The point of some return"
Do you dare?
Nobody knows what lies beyond it
Some things enter, some things leave and become.... european.....

other things vaguely about myself
top 0.001% owl city listener of 2020
top 0.05% owl city listener of 2021
i'm cursed to only be able to speak and type in monotone essays

this one is an unfinished giga doc on regional highlander differences, might touch up or resume sometime, lost interest in maintaining it as a whole and it's more of a time capsule for myself. note that metagames and my thoughts have changed especialy in aus and na, that being said I still strongly stand by my distaste for the social side of na.
Currently Online
Artwork Showcase
3 2
if you are looking below this point you failed the wisdom check
Friend requests welcome

Links & Socials

Discord: Bliztank#1499
RGL Profile []
Tf2 Player Interviews (new interviews on mon/wed/fri at 12 pm est if i have content, sometimes sat too)
Discord Server []
Froyotech vs chaos incarnate
Twitch []

Quote Wall

Maven — 01/05/2022
You have an uncanny ability to say in 1000 words what could be said in 100
Michael (Queen) — 01/07/2022
@Bliztank (Owl Citizen) you do not worry about essay word counts
Essay word counts worry about you

Michael (Queen) — 12/15/2021
playing on 200 ping is good for you because it now aligns with your mind
200 ping in mind 200 ping in game

syd — 12/26/2021
@Bliztank (Owl Citizen) ur arms look hilariously long in this picture
It looks like you are 70% above the waist and 30% below the waist

Bliztank (Owl Citizen) — 11/20/2021
@Michael (Queen) oh also I'll be taking atleast two of your fedoras of your choice as a fedora tax
Michael (Queen) — 11/20/2021
Kk leave me the pink one
Bliztank (Owl Citizen) — 11/20/2021
Agreeable terms
My empire grows
As does my hair

Bliztank (Owl Citizen) — 11/18/2021
good idea th o
make them offers they can't refuse
start the tf2 mafia
that's my calling
to defeat the typical community issues
we have to make a mafia
it's so clear
offer people protection for money
protect their pug groups

Bliztank (Owl Citizen) — 10/25/2021
mmm yes quite
@darzie take my course
15$ lessons
reject emotion
i will teach you the way
darzie — 10/25/2021
I like the idea but can I have it for free

SnaiL — 10/24/2021
you look vaguely like a quaker in this one

insouciant (Micahlele) Oct 18, 2021 @ 6:03pm
this mf wakes up at 4am to play team fortress two

syd — 07/09/2021
@Bliztank (Owl Citizen) how can u disagree its literally my decision u donut

vibeisveryo — 12/28/2021
Generic Suburban Neighborhood #83749

Bum — 11/27/2021
Ok willy wonka
xX_lil_d1sagreem3nt@gas_station — 11/27/2021
Ok willy wonka
raisins — 11/27/2021
Ok willy wonka
Nice drip
koolaidalan — 11/27/2021
Bliztank — 11/27/2021
cyclowns — 11/27/2021
willy wonker

koolaidalan — 11/02/2021
This is a certified virgin moment

Bliztank — 09/27/2021
shrekless attack
makka (in all caps) — 09/27/2021
it cost you nothing to not say this

makka (in all caps) — 09/04/2021
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥'s a 1 man band/adventuring party
bard too, so jack of all trades says ♥♥♥♥ you to all skill checks
ethan — 09/04/2021
man not only rolled almost 100 but selected BARD
makka (in all caps) — 09/04/2021
what college?
Bliztank — 09/04/2021
makka (in all caps) — 09/04/2021
also what patron
makka (in all caps) — 09/04/2021
man doesn't need a party

Luigi — 07/30/2021
i was gonna say "u can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness" before i realized that was exactly what u were referencing and im stupid

Luigi — 04/02/2021
@Bliztank If you don't play HuniePop to completion I'm killing you btw
Finish the battle.

Akimbodia — 12/25/2021
ur arms are wood beams
help i don't main pyro
I lied. (Or did I? (no really idk))
Sometimes updated, I think.
Subbing will not be listed as I do not feel like subbing is conclusive towards experience and team performance
4.14/3200, 3.1 cm (1.2 in)/360 on every class.


S19 Iron: Masochistic Meetup, Spy/Leader, 4-4
S20 Steel: Its Hip to be Square, Sub, 4-4
S21 Steel: Pythagorean Meetup, Spy/Leader, 4-4
S22 Steel: PANomonium, Spy, 3-5
S29: Home Depot eSports, Multiclass, 5-5

S1 Amateur: Sifety, Spy/Leader, 9-1 Second Place
S3 Advanced: Home Depot eSports, Pyro, 2-5
S4 Advanced: 1 Korean 9 Keyboards, Pyro/Coleader, 7-3 Third Place
S5 Advanced: Night Crew, Pyro, 3-6
S7 Advanced: Home Depot eSports, Pyro, 4-4
S8 Challenger: Desperado Crush Mambo Combo, Soldier/Coleader, 8-4; second place
S11 Invite: Two Pastas and a Side Salad, Soldier, 0-7
S12 Advanced: China National TF2 Team, Pyro/Soldier, 3-4
S13 Advanced- China National TF2 Team, Soldier, 3-4

I honestly forget but I played for Home Depot EU iterations on Pyro and Spy for a bit whenever that was a thing (sometime between s17-s21 I think?)
ETF2L S23 Div 3: Magnificent Bastards, Heavy, 6-4
ETF2L S24 Mid: Europe All Stars, Soldier, 5-5
UGC S34: Platinum, Middies in Paris vol 2, Soldier, 3-4
ETF2L S25 Mid: Nameless Team, Soldier, 3-3, team died week 4.
UGC S36: Silver: Div? Soldier/Pyro/Demo/Spy depending on the week, 10-0 first place.
UGC S37: Platinum: Div? Soldier, 2-6

South America
LBTF S6 Principal: Barebones, Heavy/Demo, 2-5

RSL S8 Prem: Always salt your pasta while boiling it, Heavy, 0-7
RSL S9 Prem: Pool Water Drinkers, Soldier, 2-8
RSL S10 Prem: League of Legumes, Heavy, 2-8
RSL S11 Preseason: Prem demo for Fellowship of the ping
OzFortress Season 2 Main: Pyro/spy for GO TO JAIL, 8-3 so far

UGC S33 Platinum: Meow.BLACK, Soldier, 2-8

Misc Highlander
RGL Region Wars Div 2: Team Deep South, Spy, 4-1 Second Place
RGL Exp Cup #1 Div 3: Twenty-One Cent Communications, Spy, 2-1 Second Place
RGL Exp Cup #2 Advanced: Markers and the E-Boys, Pyro, 1-2
RGL Exp Cup #3 Advanced-2: Rareform, Soldier, 3-1 Second Place
RGL Exp Cup #4 Invite-2: Goose Lagoon, 2-1 Second Place
RGL Exp Cup #5- Advanced 1: I Have Hired This Bird, 0-6


S5 Amateur: New (a)woo Order, Spy, 7-0 First Place
S6 Main: *Dabs on HL Mains*, Demo, 1-4
S7 Advanced: Blackjack and Hookers White, Flex, 5-2 Second Place
S8 Advanced: Purple Air Pods +1, Soldier/Flex, 3-4
S9 Div 1: The Senate, Soldier/Flex; 3-4
S4 EU Invite: Lure Intelligence Time, Flex, 0-7

Prolander Cups
One Day Cup #3 Div 4: Lob Laws Slob Lobs, 4-1 First Place
One Day Cup #4 Div 2: Sigafoo's Saiyans, 1-3
One Day Cup #5 Div 1: Cliffside PL, 5-0 First Place
One Day Cup #6 Div 1: Cliffside PL, 2-3
Eu One Day Cup #2 Div 2: Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweek, 1-3


Localhost Philedalphia Open- Top Ramen eSports, Pocket soldier while dressed in a Riddler Suit, 2-5 |16th place

S28 Steel:, Roamer, 3-5
S29 Silver: Blink 182, Roamer, 2-6
S30 Steel: J4MMERS R3BORN, Roamer, 4-4

S31 Open: w3rldw1de rUn d0wn, Roamer, 7-9

S1 Intermediate: The Enemies Lack Lemons, Roamer, 5-11
S2 Intermediate: Purple Air Pods, Roamer, 14-5 Third Place
S3 Main: Has Anyone Seen Naknak?, Roamer, 9-8

S1 Main: Kegateam, Flex, 2-3
S2 Main: Eat Sleep Fortnite Repeateded, Flex, 11-3 Third Place
Cup #1 Div 1: Team Europe, Flex, 2-4, ( Funny pyro vs froyo [])


S15 Steel: Spymid, Soldier, 6-3
S16 Silver: Fellas 2.0, Soldier, 5-3
S19 Silver: Bald KSI, Soldier, 6-5

Misc Stuff

Knightcomp, I forget the details
Ready Steady Pan S5, Playoffs ( Almost 100 kills [])
The two RGL fresh meat prolander cups, I forget the details
2007 7s: Auto-Alien, Flex/Leader, 4-0 First Place
Pass Time Federation- EU High: Gentlemercs Union, Pyro/Flex, 2-1
other things i've forgotten
GTO day of defeat source team, rocket main for one tournament
Favorite Game
Hours played

Recent Activity

2,912 hrs on record
last played on Dec 9
10,607 hrs on record
last played on Dec 5
6.9 hrs on record
last played on Dec 5
nightjar Oct 29 @ 1:02am 
FP Oct 28 @ 8:38am 
dotaplayer69 x3 Oct 11 @ 2:58am 
cool ♥♥♥♥, but i think you should start playing dota
FP Aug 17 @ 9:08am 
the tank himself
hitze Aug 16 @ 4:59am 
hi (sorry for bad england)
yungdesk. Jul 29 @ 9:42pm 
........................../>  フ <3
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....................../` ミ_xノ Have a nice week buddy
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