Recent reviews by Mina's sex slave

Lore accurate Lance TROLL getting 13 pole positions in a row without making love with the barrier

How about you fix your ass game so ppl start playing pirate games again? Combat is ass and no real map update in last decade it feels always pointless skins and ♥♥♥♥♥♥ side tall tales. And whats up with this 1983 VC and chat censorship?

I dislike anime and PS games but this, I entered into this thinking its overhyped and just carried by reddit simps when it turns out its highkey a generational masterpiece. The graphics are old gen PS level and controls are ultra janky on keyboard but somehow? the combat is one of the best. Now the story and lore of this game are unimaginable if you love philosophy, exsistentialism, Dostoyevski and ethics, pure masterpiece. It almost makes me wonder why was this made a game and not a novel. Music... idk man what the ♥♥♥♥ were they cooking but it always feels like ur fighting gods and its insane. Game gives u a feeling of exploring the story from such a weird and uniquely goated angle that makes ordinary or wierd events and things from before become like easter eggs and pieces of puzzle later on in the story. exmpl. The reason why 2B was strategically named 2B.

ultra spoiler for upper statement--->
She knew everything from the begining even more than commander, real name model 2E (2B) missioned to constantly kill 9S if he came too close to the truth, but they also expected her to become sentient in doing so, thus they named her To Be

Took me 31hours to beat the game for the first time (brutal diff) and can tell you this game truly feels like a sequel to DL1. Story is insane, parkour feels amazing (same Harran design structures), combat can get clunky but is great combined with the new beast mode that truly gets you back into the legend of Harran feel. Animations are no glaze, but astonishing and enemy CPUs actually can predict you. Enviroment is again no glaze astonishing having that eerie Harran vibes with different weathers. Crafting and looting is 4x harder here imo than in the OG and it feels like actual survival, so no more kyle crane with 66,424 rifle ammo/shotgun ammo. Cutscenes are no longer tied to 1st person (never played DL2) and it feels amazing.

Only downsides are the decieveing rope elevator hitbox (you have to press interact at specific spot and u cant jump to grab it resulting in many dumb deaths) and zombies randomly spawning behind you in boss fights to grab you + unable to sprint diagonally, only while pressing W, result in some frustrating unblockable stunblocks in which the boss can kill you.

All in all, legendary rare 10/10 game. Thank you Techland.

Lore ties and thoughts (SPOILERS): This game confirms that not siding with the mother in The following is the cannon ending and that Kyle Crane from my understanding is the first infected who escaped Harran Quarantine zone and infected the rest of the world. He somehow didnt turn but is instead Half-Volatile hence gaining the beast ability. This game had some amazing lore itself, it had so many cliche betrayals. I havent read the Fischer family deep dive lore behind the virus and Baron betraying the "disbanded" GRE (theyre not disbanded) but it might unravel the truth behind the Harran virus origins.

Engineers wet dream, you are thrown on a alien planet with nothing, tasked to complete the space shipyard. You can complete it by crafting for 2,4k hours or you can start your own industrial revolution. You go from crafting ingots and hiding from hogs to building megafactories that take up half of the valley and playing with uranium or dark matter. At the beggining it feels like youre playing in survival but as you progress it feels more and more like creative, the tasks never get easier tho so dont get fooled by building one-time production lines. (yes you can build nukes)

Gameplay: 10/10
-Insanely creative and fun
-You get the option to make it repetative and even then it is creative and fun
-Has a clear goal
-Requires a lot of planning, calculating and designing

Visuals: 9/10
-Interesting biomes, enemies and flora
-Great graphics for this kind of game
-Models look super polished
-Everything is well animated
-Map is always the same (we will probably see expansions) but is huge

Audio: 8/10
-Has some banger OSTs, but mostly normal ambience or biome themes that dont go out of the box
-Sound effects sound clear and perfect, have that sharpnes to them

Lore: -/10
-Doesn't really have lore besides you working for FICSIT to save "humanity" throughout most of the game
-You do encounter alien artifacts that prompt you to think about phylosophical and moral questions/ get an insight how aliens view the exsistance

Price:
-The game is not free but it really is a one time purchase, no hidden cosmetics, DLC packs, no pay-to-win, u get multiplayer and every upcoming update with content

Rating: 10/10
-game is just kinda perfect and super polished, true gem in todays market
-If you like minecraft, terraria, factorio and anykind of basebuilding u wont be disappointed
-I do mechanical engineering and this game truly is Satisfactory

Fortnite V2, overhyped, game has no point except going in for ♥♥♥♥♥♥ items that arent guaranteed even if you come to the designated area and crafting ♥♥♥♥♥♥ weapons that make Rainbow6 balancing look godlike. U will be constantly gatekept from getting anything better by basement dwelling sweatlords that moderate reddit and camp in rat holes with lvl 67 gear. Avg match -> spawn in blue gate, theres instantly 2 hornets over you shooting them alerts the bombardier that gives you c-ncer and whilst running away u run into monolinguar arabs with lvl 666 gear that insantly shoot you ->back to 0

just play roblox at this point

And just how it all began so did it end, this game was one of the rare REAL hero shooters, nothing like that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ industrial made overwatch. It featured truly unique character designs which you could also customize to your liking using "runes" and items similar to league of legends which basically killed counterpicking and gave birth to infinite strategies.

The game never cared about "balanced" abilities which was super fun (Zhin 300m dash into oneshotting the tank by pressing ult). Although ultimates were never the insta win button (which sounds insane since few characters can legit erase you by looking at you) they were more of an icing at the top for the unique kits of each character and game knew this thus made them available to you almost every 30seconds. Maps were always balanced since theyve always been mirrored and featured an interesting and insanely fun mash up of HYBRID and CONTROL mode called SIEGE (something Overwatch cant reproduce with their factory made game design). Game was always left in shadows by their publisher and by claims that it copied Overwatch which is funny since this game was in dev before Overwatch was even announced, predicted and solved all the original problems of hero shooters and it was genuinely fun at any elo even pro play, again something Overwatch didnt do and will never do.

The game embraced the IDEA of you being A HERO/CHAMPION and having insane abilities fighting in insane landscapes featuring insane knight/paladin music but it ultimatively failed after 7 years:

1)Because HI-REZ studios just wanted a money cow, not caring about the game and players (trend milking company)
2)The game was made with a budget of 5 beers and a corn dog
3) Evil Mojo Paladins team was reduced to -3 devs by Hi-REZ even tho they were working on the game out of pure love
4)Overshadowed by Overwatch because it was run by Blizzard (one of the most polished and GOATED huge studios at the time)

RIP 2018-2025

emma crush me pls

The god of time attack racing, truly a masterpiece of it's time. Have over 15k+ hours in this game since 2008 and it just never gets boring. You can never truly reach the time limit, whenever you approach it you just push it further. Nations forever.
On stage select screen, holding RMB and typing "unlock" unlocks all stages