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I have had a steam controller since around 2016, almost right when it was released. I got mine from a GameStop. Best. Controller. Not even close. It's true that it has a steep learning curve, but once you surpass that, hoy bowdy is it good. You suddenly go from a mid controller to whatever you need. The lack of a second joystick sucks, yes, but the besides the Steam Deck (Which is a console, not a controller), there is nothing to even come close to how good the Steam Controller is to use. Ergonomics? Feel great! Buttons: Perfect feeling! Build Quality: Immaculate! Overall: the GOAT of controllers.

Crab Champions is a rogue-like of all time. One would say THE game of all time. It is a cross between Risk of Rain and Crab Rave developed by the artist behind Crab Rave, Noisestorm. Today, Imma take you through the game and explain everything needed to know about Crab Champions to be the Crab Champion.

So, let’s start with the basics. What is a rogue-like? A rogue-like is a subgenre of Role Playing Games, RPG for short, where the player or players fight enemies, collect loot, and lose said loot if they are killed or otherwise meet their maker. Rogue-likes can be other genres like FPS’s, but they are commonly based in the confines of an RPG.
Crab Champions said “Gun go brrrrrrrrrrrrr,” and dropped most RPG elements in favor of the shooter genre, and you know what? I’m in love with it.

Speaking of guns, there are a total of 14 guns and weapons in Crab Champions, the Auto Rifle, the Minigun, the Blade Launcher, the Cluster Launcher, the Dual Shotguns, the Burst Pistol, the Sniper, the Crossbow, the Rocket Launcher, the Dual Pistols, the Auto Shotgun, the Orb Launcher, the Flamethrower, and the Arcane Wand, ranging from overpowered to high hell to the worst of poo tier trash.

You’ll start off with the Auto Rifle. This is the generic SMG of the guns, both literally and figuratively. Average in all stats, including fire rate, bullet spread, and mag size, however, it can become ridiculous with time and the right upgrade mods.

The next weapon on the list is the Minigun. Not gonna lie, at launch, this weapon kinda sucked, but it has since improved drastically. High fire rate, mid bullet spread, and the highest base magazine size in the game. This weapon feels powerful, and doesn’t really stop feeling powerful.

The Blade Launcher is a strange weapon. What it lacks in the damage department, it makes up for in the fact it can hit enemies multiple times thanks to its built in piercing shot. It’s not as a perk, mind you, but it’s a baked in stat. Shooting a blade that deals 4 damage per hit and hitting upwards of 3 times, this weapon can be fun for most players that want a fun gimmick.

The Dual Shotguns. Hoy Bowdy do you feel like the Doom Slayer with this. With high bullet spread and a short travel, this is a great choice for getting up and personal with your enemies. Also, since this is 2 guns, you can theoretically double your fire rate if you time your other shotgun perfectly. YOU CAN BE DOOM CRAB!!!

Meet the sniper. [Play the Meet the Sniper jingle]. Not that sniper, the Crab Champions sniper [Play the Meet the Sniper (distorted) jingle]. Close enough, I guess. This weapon boasts a long ranged, high damage, piercing projectile. It has a slightly quicker fire rate than the dual shotguns, and honestly it’s pretty good for those who don’t wanna be in the thick of the hoard of crabs.

The Dual pistols are fun. This is a Doom Slayer feeling weapon, but instead of damage, you get arthritis- I mean speed. It can fire somewhat fast. With 5 Damage per shot, 6 shots per second times 2 guns, you can get an average of 60 damage per second with this weapon, if you use both guns. It also has a fairly low vertical recoil, at 4, and also a fairly low projectile travel distance. Overall, I say it’s a fair weapon.

The Auto Shotgun is a fairly decent weapon all things considered. This sounds worse than it feels. It feels powerful enough to take on the first 30 islands, but not too powerful to take on much beyond 30 solo. I’d put this weapon in B tier if this was a tier list.

The Arcane Wand. You know what I don’t like? The Arcane Wand. Honestly, an amazing weapon on paper. You are Herry Crab-or, but honestly, this weapon is let down by low damaging projectiles. Now, this does have a guaranteed weapon perk called “Arcane Shot,” which deals damage overtime, but it doesn’t make up for it.

In the name of getting this review done, and to increase player counts, I’ll let y’all play the game to find out how the other weapons work and feel. Anyway, we are finally explaining what this game entails. As stated at the start of this video, Crab Champions is a rogue-like, one of the rogue-likes of all time to be precise. This game follows a set formula per 10 islands. It usually goes like this: Kill everyone for 3 islands, collect loot on each island, evade endless enemies for a time limit on island 4, collect loot, meet *Tony*, kill 2 island’s populations, collect loot on each island, evade again for another island, collect loot, meet *Tony*, kill a big enemy, collect tons of loot, repeat 2 times, and you can complete the game or repeat another 3 times for even more loot. After 1 loop, you stop earning keys, so it’s kinda pointless beyond achievements.

Now, what are keys? Keys are how you unlock weapons and get a perk before going into an island. You need 3 keys to use the Key Totem in the Hub Island. You get 1 key per elite, which is every 10th island, and 3 per boss every 30 islands. After you unlock all the weapons, keys are basically pointless, so there’s that.

Now hold up. Who is *Tony*, and why is he so important? I can only answer one of those. Tony is the shopkeep and gardener. He sells goods in exchange for crystals dropped by enemies and salvaged perks. He also provides a health garden for free. Just don’t insult Tony. He’s so nice anyway.

After every island, you should notice a chest that spawns on the island somewhere. That chest contains one of 4 types of loot: Weapon Mods, Grenade mods, Perks, and instant use items. Weapon mods and Grenade mods give upgrades or sidegrades to your weapon and grenades. Instant use items are, well, instant. Gain 50 max HP, gain 113 more crystals, etc. Perks are a bit of a wild card. Some upgrade your crab, some upgrade your weapon over time, and others are just… weird.

Anyway, there are 3 sets of islands: The Overworld, The Tundra, and Hell. … Who doesn’t love Hell? Anyway, sets have differing enemies and/or atmosphere. The Overworld has standard crabs, the Tundra has Ice Crabs, and Hell has… standard… crabs… WHAT?!
Yes, the Overworld and Hell have the same crab, but Hell has Lava, and the Overworld has water. See? Different.
Anyway, each island you clear raises the HP, damage, speed, and sometimes armor of every enemy you face, making gameplay usually rise as you play. As you might see, that may or may not be the case. It depends on what difficulty you choose with the difficulty totem on the main island.

You have Easy, Normal, Nightmare, and Ultra Chaos, with Ultra Chaos locked behind a grind wall. Easy is great for first time players, Normal is somewhat challenging, but very much so doable, Nightmare is very challenging, and Ultra Chaos is behind a grind wall for a reason. We don’t talk about Ultra Chaos. There are also Difficulty Modifiers, ranging from “Aight, this is fine,” to “OH GOD WHY ARE THERE 3 BOSSES?!?!”

Let’s speedrun these last 2 totems: The multiplayer totem lets you invite other crabs to your hub island, who can accompany you through the game of Crab Champions. The skin totem lets you select what color crab you are after you unlock the skins by playing the game.

And that should be it. Imma go play some Crab Champions in it's beta form, which is updated regularly and has a ton of added content atm. Should you buy this? Absolutely yes! At MSRP? Absolutely yes! What if it goes on sale? PICK IT UP ASAP!!!

Amazing platformer that's easy for beginners but challenging for experts. From Mafia Town to Dead Bird Studio to the Finale, everything is top notch. The level design, the movement mechanics, even the online functionality isn't bad. I love this game.

DuckGame. Woo-ooo. Everyday they're out there cranking W's. Woo-ooo! Tales of daring very stupid dumb strats! Woo-ooo. Not Pony Game or Dino Game, no DuckGame. Woo-ooo!

For real though: Got myself addicted to this game, got my friends addicted to this game, and we've been playing every Friday since.
Quack out of Quack game: The Star Wars Episode 4-6 of the DuckGame series.

Cannibal go SCREEEEEEEE

In all seriousness, this game is fricken fun and funny. I'd recommend this to anyone who is into survival games, but not horror games. It's not a big horror game, focusing on survival first.
Overall, good game.

VR COD Zombies is best mode, hands down.

After a week of troubleshooting, I found out that I had an EXTREMELY RARE issue with my PC causing my AppData folder to completely block all apps from adding stuff there, requiring Administrator to fix. If you have a problem opening the game and the solutions from NinjaKiwi don't work, request a refund. It's not worth the hours of waiting for it to finish. If you don't have the issue/The solutions from NinjaKiwi do work, great! Keep the game! It's worth it! Below is a solution for those who either don't know how to refund a game or are still wanting a solution.

1.) Go to Windows File Explorer
2.) %appdata%
3.) Go to the Appdata Folder.
4.) Click Share
5.) Advanced Security
6.) Change the owner to yourself (Make sure you type your username, then click Check Names. It should already say that you're the owner, but trust me, the "owner" isn't you.)
7.) OK for that window ONLY.
8.) Check the box saying "Replace all child object permission entries with inheritable permission entries from this object"
9.) Patience is a Virtue.

If that doesn't work, feel free to comment, and I'll try to help you.

Good Game. Hope it wins GotY.

yes

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