Funniest stuff ive heard all year

Why did Dario bring a grilled cheese sandwich to the gaming tournament?




Because he heard it had an extra "cheesy" strategy for winning!

Today when I walked into my 3D modeling class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. m' v''' had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than an elephant's trunk. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them.

The teacher starts the lecture, and m' v''' turns his laptop on. The coloured lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. m' v''' ladies and gentlemen.

the young man**