Recent reviews by Butterball

Servers are ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Einstein, Newton, Hawking, all great thinkers throughout history. They all had major questions that they desired answers to. While they all had a strive for knowledge, not everything was in their grasp. While I do not see myself as one with high intelligence, patience, or really any kind of talent or skill, I believe I can discover one great mystery. In this paper, I shall discuss why my penis is so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ small.

For context, while I am a man of above average stature, my Johnson does not appear to scale correctly to my size. Many may describe it as a ‘micro-penis’. Partners in the past have voiced complaints and the possibility that I may just be a woman with a prominent clitoris. I assure you that this is not the case, but it is rather concerning that some could see this as a believable theory.

As part of my research, I decided to ask a range of people what their opinions are of my penis. This was to ensure that this was not just the bias of sexual partners who have been with much larger men and see me as disappointing in comparison.

Mother - “Your winkie looks the same as the day you were born! While it seemed fine then, I am a bit worried that it doesn’t seem to have changed much as you got older. Now do you want chicken nuggets or french fries for dinner?”

My current partner Stacy - “I keep telling you that I’ll only jack that pimple off if you upgrade the Netflix subscription.”

Thad, Stacy’s very close friend and masseuse - “Bro, I don’t think you have much you need to worry about. While it might not have the length, it has other qualities that more than make up for it. The thickness is top notch. Not enough to make it a ♥♥♥♥♥, but you have enough diameter to give it a presence. Your erection reaches a good angle, I’d say around 105 degrees above flaccid. Your penis also does not seem to have much of a curve port or starboard. You also display very good public upkeep. The trim is nice on both the pubis and the ballsack.”

So I certainly seemed to receive a mixed reaction to my mini-me. While the women in my life seem to expect more, Thad was very supportive. I’ve always liked Thad, he bought me a Nintendo Switch for Christmas last year. I played it all through Stacy’s extended, loud massage session in her bedroom. However, I still desired to discover what caused me to be lacking in an important area.

One obvious source would be genetics. If other family members struggled with their size, then it would be no wonder that I would struggle with the same issue. This required me to do some research into family members.

First was my father. This was rather simple. All I had to do was invite him to a session at the gym. After our extended workout, we both headed to the showers. He had no fear stripping right off in front of me. To my surprise I was greeted with what can only be described as an elephant. This was basically the Godzilla of ♥♥♥♥♥. This left me absolutely gobsmacked and I had to pull my jaw back up from surprise. My father offered to scrub me down but I declined, there was more research to be done.

My father left me utterly confused so I had to continue looking. It’s possible that this trait could skip generations. That meant that I had to go and examine my grandfather. He lives in a retirement home and receives lots of aid due to his dementia. I went to visit him for the first time in 5 years. I usually avoided the man since he started shouting racial slurs at dogs. I entered his room to find him sitting in a wheelchair looking out the window. I sat to chat to him for a while while thinking of an excuse to catch a look. He soon mentioned that he needed to use the bathroom, so I took my chance and offered to help. I wheeled him to the toilet and stripped him off. I was hoping to see a peanut, but what I saw was a melon. Again, I was presented with an object so large I was surprised I wasn’t pulled into its orbit. His member rolled out like a garden hose and almost hit the toilet water. I ran out in fear and returned home to rethink my research.

So far, it seemed that I am some kind of anomaly in my family. All other men that I had examined displayed a far greater size than myself, enough to make a horse blush. Meanwhile, I possess something an ant would laugh at. This only left me with the possibility that the cause is not genetic, but is actually an outside source.

This got me thinking about the quote from my mother. She seemed to have a vivid memory of my size as a baby which came off as quite odd. I myself had never been too interested in what I was like as an infant so I had never looked at any old photos. Perhaps it was time for me to do so. I returned to the old family home and went into the attic. I found the box labelled ‘90s photos’ and took a look inside. The photos left me absolutely mortified. What I saw was an infant with fully defined pecs and abs. He was lifting different weights over his head in each photo, each heavier than the next. I ran downstairs to my mother to demand an explanation. It turns out that since the age of 1, my parents had been providing me with performance enhancing steroids. When questioned about why, she explained that they wanted to give me a physical boost from birth. They wanted me to grow up to be a famous athlete or become a professional wrestler. They stopped providing me with steroids when they found me tearing the heads off of rats.

the are only a couple things i dont like

super fun

very yes

allows you to decorate your pc

All of the time i have on this game is me trying to get it to work