Here's my day so far:

went to jail,

lost the girl of my dreams,

and got my butt kicked pretty good.

Still, things could be a lot worse.

Oh, that's right.

I'm falling to my death.

Guess they can't.

How'd it all come to this, you ask?

My end starts at the beginning.

The very beginning.

Yes, that's me.

I had a fairly standard childhood.

I came from, what you might call,

a broken home.

Literally broken.

I was eight days old

and still living with my parents.

How sad is that?

Clearly it was time to move on.

Here is your minion.

He will take care of you.

And here is your binky.

You are destined for...

I didn't quite hear that last part,

but it sounded important.

- ...two, one.

- Destined for what?

I set out to find my destiny.

Turns out a kid from the Glaupunkt

quadrant had the exact same idea.