10
Products
reviewed
0
Products
in account

Recent reviews by beans, lots of beans

Showing 1-10 of 10 entries
5 people found this review helpful
11.8 hrs on record (9.5 hrs at review time)
Miyazaki does Metroidvania. There are no words for the beauty this game possesses, both graphically and emotionally. If any of the preceding words evoked a reaction, then this will be more a religious experience than a game.
Posted February 20, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
18.6 hrs on record (18.5 hrs at review time)
Metroid clones were created to one day evolve into Axiom Verge. The pounding bass was enough to win me over. The silky gameplay, throwback graphics, and apocalyptic story were just icing on the cake. Just get it already.
Posted February 20, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
62.7 hrs on record (40.1 hrs at review time)
A computer convinced me that there is no god and life is meaningless. Incredible. ∞/0.
Posted February 20, 2017. Last edited November 25, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
11.8 hrs on record (4.9 hrs at review time)
I knew that years of assembling IKEA furniture would come in handy one day.
Posted February 20, 2017.
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1 person found this review helpful
16.5 hrs on record (12.9 hrs at review time)
This game is a giant puzzle in the vein of Portal, but replace the insane computer with LSD. Lots of LSD.

I found it to be one of the best puzzle games I've ever played. I asked Steam to suggest other similar games, and the overlay started to melt off my screen and got all over the sandwich next to my monitor. Take from that what you will.
Posted January 19, 2014.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
37.9 hrs on record (37.4 hrs at review time)
Favorite game in one of my favorite series. The music! Ye gods, the music! Tight action, fast paced, makes you feel powerful, and the bosses are epic beyond comprehension for any game, much less a 16-bit type. Can't recommend hard enough.
Posted December 31, 2013.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
3.7 hrs on record (3.2 hrs at review time)
EVERYTHING IS GEOMETRY AND EVERYTHING HURTS
Posted December 31, 2013.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
16.6 hrs on record (11.9 hrs at review time)
VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
Posted July 16, 2012.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
48.6 hrs on record (33.4 hrs at review time)
Think Minecraft, but 2D old-school throwback mode. Awesome game.
Posted January 1, 2012.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1,134.1 hrs on record (1,092.5 hrs at review time)
It's free now. You have no excuse :D
Posted July 9, 2011.
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Showing 1-10 of 10 entries