NO WHY AM I ON REDDIT

I'M GONNA BE FUCKING SICK

HE DOES NOT MISS HIS WIFE ROMANTICALLY BUT GOD DOES HE MISS ME CARNALLY

HE HAS BEEN TO MY HOME. MANY TIMES. HE VISITED IT WHEN HE WANDERED IN SEARCH OF LIFE'S PLEASURES

HE DOESNT WASTE TIME ON GOD...

MYSAULT

GOOD EVENING BABY I MADE YOU YOUR FAVORITE MEAL [PULLS OUT A WINE GLASS FULL OF CHOCOLATE MILK AND A PLATE OF DINO NUGGIES]

HI MEYURSAULT HIIIIII

I NEED TO BECOME HIM. I MUST GROW STRONG AND POWERFUL.

HE DID NOT CRY AT HIS MOTHER'S FUNERAL <3

TODAY HE KILLED MOTHER (OR MAYBE IT WAS YESTERDAY?)

HE IS CLEARLY DIFFERENT IN TERMS OF COMPOSITION <3

MEURSAULT PLEASE TIGHTEN YOUR HOLD

HIIIIIII MEURSALTH.

BRINGING MEURSAULT WITHIN 3KM OF A FUJOSHI AND WATCHING THEIR SKIN MELT OFF LIKE RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK

THE ONLY KING I RESPECT

MEURSAULT BABY HIII HI HELLO HIIIIIII OH MY GOD :)

BAMBOO HATTED KINO

BAMBOO HATTED KIM IF HE WAS KINO

THIS IS SLIPKNOT

HE HAS 97 MENTAL ILLNESSES AND IS BANNED FROM MOST PUBLIC SPACES </3

The dressing is erroneous overall; failure to properly cook the chicken has resulted in a residual stench of blood and other unpleasant odors; the sauce is too thick to bring out a deep flavor; the inconsistent cuts of the meat contribute to the serving's inability to rouse one's appetite. The season and spices are a complete disaster, and the taste in my mouth is even worse than plaster. Lacking sugar, you tossed two and a half spoons of butter, and the end result simply belongs right in the gutter. Yi Sang. I must ask if you aim to throng my teeth and prong my tongue by cooking wrong- seeing as this plate's a headstrong lens to ding-dong notions of what food is to you all along.

[CAR CRASH] [GLASS SHATTERING] ‘GOOD LORD!’ [GENERAL COMMOTION] [BABY CRYING] ‘WAAAAH WAAAAH’ [YELLING] [POLICE SIRENS] WEEWOO WEEWOO [HELICOPTERS] ‘WE’RE REPORTING LIVE-‘ [EXPLOSION] ‘MY LEG... MY LEG...’

ITS MY WIFEEE HIII HONEY HIII HELLO