Recent reviews by nieYAS

𝘚𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘍𝘰𝘨𝘨𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘙𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘧 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴
𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥

https://youtu.be/kFr8SdOS5ic

𝚗𝚘 𝚙𝚕𝚘𝚝,
𝚗𝚘 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐,
𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚔𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚐𝚞𝚢𝚜

We had two bags of cigarettes, seventy-five cotton balls doused in alcohol, five sheets, high powered painkillers, a bottle half full of disinfectant, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored antibiotics, beta blockers, antidepressants, vitamins... and also a quart of whiskey, a quart of red wine, a case of Pop, a pint of bleach and two dozen of sleeping tablets.
Not that we needed all that for the death, but once you get locked into a hopeless survival, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.
The only thing that really worried me was the bleach. There is nothing in the world more helpless and unhappy and thirsty than a man in the depths of a bleach poisoning. And I knew we'd get into that toxic stuff pretty soon.

• 1 pound Terraria
  
• 1 can (10 ounce) The Long Dark
  
• 1 bunch The Forest
  
• 1 teaspoon The Binding of Isaac
  
• 1 tablespoon Dark Souls
  
• ½ cup Jumanji aesthetic
  
• Fear and Loathing to taste

Step 1
Take Terraria and carefully remove "digging to the Hell" part (don't worry, you'll be there anyway), leave crafting and farming aspects. Add 3rd dimension.

Step 2
Open frozen The Long Dark. Get survival mechanic and cut it on 4 pieces: leave the first one as is and unfreeze other three. Fry and get pickle in rain water 2/3 of those pieces. Now you have all seasons of misery, stuff prepared Terraria with that sh!t.

Step 3
Stir The Binding of Isaac weirdness and Dark Souls finghting. Coat the bottom of a 9x13-inch casserole dish with it.

Step 4
Preheat the Scaled Furnace to 400° F (200° C). Do the same to your butt during boss fight.

Step 5
Arrange Le Terraria De Long Dark in the bottom of the dish, and pour Jumanji aesthetic sauce over it.

Step 6
Sprinkle on with shredded The Forest.

Step 7
Bake in the preheated Scaled Furnace until hot, about entire life.

Read a whole game's wiki and get some life quality mods before start.

ᴇᴠɪʟ ɢᴇɴɪᴜs ʟᴀᴜɢʜs
ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ɪs ғᴜʟʟ ᴏғ ᴏʙsᴛᴀᴄʟᴇs
ᴍᴇᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜᴘᴇʀ ʜᴀʀᴅᴄᴏʀᴇ

ᴀʙsᴛʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ɪɴ ᴀʀᴛ
ᴍᴇᴀᴛʏ sᴘᴏɴɢᴇ ɪɴ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀғᴜʟ ɪɴᴋ
ᴘᴏʟʟᴏᴄᴋ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇᴅ

ᴡᴀᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴀ ʟɪғᴇ
ғᴇᴇʟ ᴛʜᴇ sᴡᴇᴇᴛɴᴇss ᴏғ ᴍᴇʟᴀɴᴄʜᴏʟʏ
sᴏʟɪᴛᴜᴅᴇ - ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ

Heyo, folks.
Don't be upset our favorite game is going through hard times.
I'm from the future and wanna cheer you up by telling you some good news.
So what awaits y'all soon, in 2027?

The game was ported to Source Engine 2 by Valve themselves (work began at the end of 2023 and the company had to keep it secret, so the Team Fortress: Source 2 fan-project was closed in 2024)

• The bots issue has been resolved completely. Bots promptly receive a hardware ban.
Now to be able to play TF2 you must have a real phone number linked to your steam account and Steam Guard Mobile Authenticator protection activated.

• There're 4 types of official servers:
"rookie" (only those players, whose level is below 1st tier can get there, Valve are fighting with smurfs at the moment),
"normal" (regular f2p servers, no different from the current ones),
"premium" (now it's same CS's prime, paid pass at $25),
"competetive" (same as "premium", but for competitive matches and clan wars).

• Player's level progress has milestones with rewards now.

• Reworked achievements and interface.

• The competitive mode has been completely redesigned, now it looks more like tf2center integrated into the game (with detailed player statistics in one of the main menu section).

• A clan system has been introduced into the game.
Now you can found a clan and invite people to it.
The clan profile has flexible settings:
automatically displayed clan-tag before the nickname (you no longer need to change steam profile's nickname, clan-tag is in-game feature),
clan emblem (.png file 32x32, moderated, displayed in scoreboard and player's profile.

• Valve does not skimp on organizing and running competitive games.
Now it's not just local matches or tournaments provided by community, now it's a CS Major's or Dota 2 The International's level. The game has already attracted many players from Apex, Fortnite, Overwatch 4 (especially after its bad start at release) and Valorant.

• Online growth and promotion was also facilitated by an animated mini-series based on game's lore created by Valve team with Source Film Maker 2.
During Conan's show famous actor Black Jack has admit the game his favorite. Jack loves to play as Engie, there're plenty "engineer gaming" videos on his youtube channel. Black had a collaboration one with Uncle Dane. He promised he will bring his friend Dwayne Johnson to one of game sessions, fan-base hope Rock is gonna love Heavy.

• The game has a test character-editor similar to loadout.tf, you can test any cosmetics, skins, effects, it's combo right in main menu. It supports every steam client features like screenshots, sharing character's loadout link with activity. Player even being able to form a personal wishlist there and share it with others.

• Replays system and the replay editor are back and work even better (youtube shorts, tiktok support)

• The game receives major updates regularly, just like in it's best times. I can't say more than that guys, I don't wanna spoil all the fun.

Now from general changes to some details.

• The number of slots for simultaneously equipping items has been increased from 4 to 5: four slots for cosmetics, the fifth is an action slot (medals moved here too). More combo, more variety.

• The number of slots for simultaneously equipping taunts has been increased from eight to twelve.
Now the taunt activation menu has a convenient radial view (like the vocalizer in Left 4 Dead games).

• Several new filters have appeared in the inventory. The player can toggle the display of tagged items (Halloween items, medals, etc.) using checkboxes (like default weapons do).
You can now select multiple items in your inventory, group and drag them to another page in your inventory with one click.

I'd love to tell you more, but I'm limited by the review format.
I have to go. Good luck and see you in 2027.

“I really like the game, but I couldn’t find the stupid cake.”