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broken ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mess but it'll be fine when fixed

somehow still the smoothest launch of 2021

scammed me out of an achievement

seer

i gave this game some time, hoping a major update might address the lack of most basic QoL features that have been present in not just the previous titles, but any respectable video game in the last couple of years. this is still an early access title with glaring issues that are being for some reason deliberately ignored, and i have no idea how anyone can call this amalgamation a "finished" product.

in even just an hour of gameplay, i became unbelievably frustrated at the lack of features, polish, and general rational thought. items become highlighted as upgrades even though every single quantifiable statistic is inferior, tooltips randomly appear and disappear with no rhyme or reason, and when they do work, they often contain overlapping text and are absolutely unreadable and unintuitive, defense upgrade status is not only barely visible, but also only appears when you're literally standing in the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ thing, defense's health bars work in a similar way making it unable to see at a glance what is even happening in a certain area, character stats are somehow more cryptic than the first game's equivalent (which didn't explain a single thing about them either), health bars made out of two solid colors merge into one another, unavailable abilities are not even being grayed out so you constantly think that you're able to use them... game's a joke.

at least half of these issues are already apparent in the bloody TUTORIAL. this game feels more like an unfinished mobile product than the first game did (the game that was literally designed for phones). i've been to MRI machines with more enjoyable gameplay loops than this insult of an entertainment product. i've had more riveting experiences getting my hand stuck in a pringles can than i've had in this loot-focused arpg that can't even properly present the aforementioned loot to the player. i have more fun tying my shoes than in this flashy cash grab.

face it, you've accidentally crafted a unique, unbalanced and fundamentally broken, but lovable and fresh little game 10 years ago and ever since, repeatedly failed not only to improve or re-capture those golden times, but to come even close to not even just feature parity, but anything resembling proper game design. please wake the ♥♥♥♥ up and text me when this comedy routine becomes playable.

Dull and boring, no graphics options other than a cryptic "Anisotropy" slider, and closed multiplayer servers. Don't really bother...

Glitched through half of the levels just so I could hear more of the story ;-;

I just spent 20 minutes carefully grabbing a car, taking it to the lot and dropping off just to put the magnet back on the truck and have it flip backwards and lose the game.

11/10.