Recent reviews by Dr. Gilderoy

"And when the truth finally dawned, it dawns in fire! But, there is one they fear, in their tongue he is Dovahkiin: DRAGONBORN!" - Esbern
"I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow in the knee…" - overused jokes
"Never should have come here!" - everyone hostile

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is a wide open roleplaying games developed by Bethesda Software. Set 200 years after the events in Oblivion, Skyrim’s plot follows the return of dragons amidst a civil war between the weakening Empire against the rebel Stormcloaks.

* Gameplay

After the thrilling prologue that doubles as character definition and tutorial, you are set free in Skyrim to fulfil your destiny as the last Dragonborn… If you don’t get sidetracked by chopping wood, clearing a yet another Nordic tomb, get shot into space by giants, fistfighting, trying to read every book and more! This freedom of actions similar to other Bethesda titles is what gives Skyrim the seemingly endless replay value (mods help there too). Unlike most RPG titles you are not forced into a class or role: your skills develop according to your usage of certain weapons and magic, plus plus non-combat skills. These skills are divided into 3 groups of Warrior, Mage and Thief to assist in gameplay purposes. Skyrim very much feels alive: outside of the cities there’s a plenty of scripted and radiant events, shifting weather, constant bandit attacks… By the time you’re done with the game you’ve probably killed more bandits than there are friendly characters in game. Oh and dragons too: they show up way too often later in the game and also may kill important characters if one spawns over a city. But it’s okay if a dragon/vampire/Forsworn/cultist kills annoying characters like Nazeem. Exploring Skyrim always felt great - the gorgeous graphics combined with atmospheric music help the mood. Even though the plot is supposed to be about the return of the dragons, popular opinion seems to favour the civil war storyline, which seems to be primarily fought in Youtube comments. Some of the other interesting storylines are about the Thieves Guild (many loot!), the Dark Brotherhood and the unnerving daedric quests.

* Expansions

Of the 3 expansions Skyrim has received Dawnguard has to be the most interesting one to me, mostly from the lovely but somewhat flawed companion Serana and the potential of owning a spooky vampire castle. Sadly Serana does not want to recreate Twilight - but at least vampires aren’t sparkly. The Forgotten Vale is one of the most beautiful areas although you’ll probably dislike the Soul Cairne. Dragonborn sees the first Dragonborn, Miraak do the usual evil business on the island of Solstheim, also giving some nostalgic Morrowind feels, although Solstheim is smaller than it seems and somewhat feels lacking in people. The realm of Apocrypha is fairly interesting and creepy in equal measure. Hearthfire gives you the option of… building houses. Amazing. Small advice: don’t be like me, just pay your steward to furnish everything.

* Closing comments

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is a wonderful game filled with enough replay value and modding to occupy a great deal of your time. Even though game has received its final update a while ago, it is still a worthwhile buy after almost 6 years, especially considering that a special edition will be released soon if you own the complete game, providing heavily improved graphics and mod support for consoles. I highly recommend buying Skyrim and its DLC's whenever they are on sale.

"giv me avp sooka" - your average teammate
"Terrorists win." - increasingly common IRL result

Counter-Strike: Global Offensive is a first person shooter co-developed by Valve Software and Hidden Path Entertainment, released in August 2012. It is the successor to Counter-Strike: Source and is the one of the most popular shooters today… Mostly due to skins and gambling. Dive into the world of endless de_dust2 matches filled with uncooperative teammates, Juan Degs and hackers!

* Gameplay

CS:GO has five main gamemodes:

• Deathmatch (for warmup for competitive)
  
• Arms Race and Demolition (good for new players to learn the ropes)
  
• Casual (avoid)
  
• Competitive (most popular mode)

I am going to focus on competitive mode since it is the way skill is measured. Bomb defusal mode, specifically, nobody plays hostage rescue in competitive. In the very well made ranking system, teams of 5, Counter-terrorists and Terrorists face off in 30 rounds, first to 16 wins, team switch after round 15. Teams buy weapons at start of rounds and decide on tactics (hint: don’t rush B). From there is becomes a contest of patience and aim - rushing without support gets you killed, but playing for pickoffs provides slow, steady results. It is important to work as a team, especially when going eco (saving money) so that there’s enough money for full buy rounds and avoiding getting into arguments. The weapons available to you are:

• Pistols (cheap and effective, somewhat too effective for the low cost)
  
• SMG’s (great eco and anti-eco weapons, buying P90 gets you scorn)
  
• Rifles (AK M4 AWP only, autosnipers gets you even more hate)
  
• Heavy (shotguns tend to be better for CT’s, LMG’s are for fun)
  
• Grenades (flashes and smokes are the best)

Getting the feel of each, including spray patterns and reload times is a rather straightforward learning experience. Although the active duty maps depend if there is an active operation, the most popular maps are Dust2, Mirage and Inferno. It is best to start playing on these maps from their simple layouts and easy to remember callouts. As for skins, they are strictly for cosmetic purposes and serve no real benefit, but it is nice to see some colour in the bleakness. Plus everyone knows skins are skills, too.

* Closing comments

Counter-Strike: Global Offensive is a fun game to pass the time, watch popular streams and tournaments, buying and trading skins for anyone interested in FPS games. Competitive might not always give you good teammates, but you can overcome that by improving yourself to carry your team to victory.

"Dosh! Grab it while it’s hot." - whopping your wad

Killing Floor is a survival multiplayer cooperative (you can solo, if you don’t like people) shooter released in 2009 by Tripwire Interactive and is the successor to various unofficial Killing Floor mods which were a total conversion mod from Unreal Tournament 2004. You pick a perk and must survive increasingly harder waves (or complete objectives while an endless wave is happening) while earning loadsa’ money for doing so.

* Gameplay

Thrown in an apocalyptic scenario (in England, chaps) where specimina (not zombies, just clones) are causing destruction, it is up various player characters to exterminate the zeds with bloody violence - that’s all there is for the plot, mostly. The gameplay is quite simple - up to 6 players fight 4/7/10 waves of zeds and the final wave facing the monstrous Patriarch, which is known for causing wipes, more than the wave before that. Sounds simple, but the correct tactics aren’t quite clear even at the easiest of difficulties, such as not shooting Fleshpounds (which should be focused by everyone or handled by a Sharpshooter or Berserker). The replay value, however, comes from the perk system, which takes a lot to grind, but offers a playstyle for everyone:

• Field Medic - keeps the gormless tossers on your team alive, with rifles that shoot healing darts
  
• Support Specialist - can carry more than others, prefers shotguns (my AA12 will kick ‘em in the ‘ead!) and welds doors faster
  
• Sharpshooter - shoot heads, get dosh with pistols and handguns, with the occasional sniper rifle
  
• Commando - mostly useless and takes a lot to level up, if you see a level 6 Commando, he most likely cheated to get that
  
• Berserker - loves melee weapons (like Axe) and Medics healing them
  
• Firebug - lights everything on fire, but suffers poorly against stronger zeds
  
• Demolitions - not Scottish, but has the most powerful explosive weapons that cost a lot

Perks are levelled from 0 to 6, and some higher difficulty servers will kick you if you’re too low, so it’s recommended to grind them a bit (a lot) for the benefits such as cheaper perk weapons, more damage, ammo and extra starting weapons. Any perk can buy any weapon (offperking) but only the correct perk gets bonuses for the weapon. Personally Sharpshooter is the most fun and rewarding perk for me, plus the headshot sound is quite satisfying. Although be prepared to get yelled at if you miss crucial shots. Dosh is obtained by killing zeds, which range from the weedy Clot to the “leg it, we’re screwed” Fleshpounds, which is spent at the of the wave at the trader for bigger guns. A healthy dose of cooperative (and correct perks) are recommended to maximize the fun.

* Special events and purchasable content

For a good number of years, there was a special map released every mid-Summer/Halloween/Christmas, with zeds being reskinned with iconic holiday characters. I’ve liked the Christmas events most for their cheerfully dissonant soundtrack and delicious cookies. There are also community weapon packs (mostly underpowered), golden and neon weapon packs (useless reskins) and characters packs (makes you look cooler) which should be bought in bundles during sales if you’re interested.

* Closing comments

While the sequel has been already released, and thus, servers can be a little empty, the original Killing Floor is still quite a fun game, guaranteed to give you many hours of cheerful, British accented zed shooting with a load of additional content to purchase - if you got the dosh.

"You're doing it wrong, give me the controller." - accurate fortune telling

The Binding of Isaac: Rebirth is a remake of the immensely popular original Binding of Isaac, developed by Edmund McMillen and Tyrone Rodriguez, released in November 2014. The basics of gameplay have remained relatively unchanged from the original (so I’ll explain more the differences; read my review on the original for gameplay) but have been expanded in multiple ways.

* Differences between the original and Rebirth

As mentioned, the basic gameplay remained the same: Isaac progresses through floors defeating enemies, collecting consumables and finding various ways to break the game. The most important change, however, has been the remake of the game remake to a custom one instead of outdated Flash, making performance much better even on older machines. In relation to that, many items and mechanics which couldn’t work due to Flash limitations have been expanded and corrected with synergies (such as one of my favourites, Tammy’s Head + Brimstone). Compared to the original, where floors seemed like a bunch of boxes smashed together, the floors in Rebirth are much more fluid, seem natural and you can always find a new room shape (to my surprise!). Money has been given a broader purpose by introducing a few new items that synergize well, but I think most of the Donation Machine, which makes the Shop much more useful and reliable, while also unlocking a few cool new items and may give a boost to your Luck stat. Although I would not recommend donating over 999 coins, as I can attest to. Seriously, don’t. A few new characters have been introduced (my favourite being the ever changing Eden) and over 150 new items (my favourites, the 12 Zodiac items). Although I haven’t had the experience due to a lack of a second player, you can have a friend assisting you as a randomly spawned familiar, which can have positive or negative traits. Finally, challenges have been expanded to a total of 20, difficulty ranging from Azazel easy to highly infuriating.

* Afterbirth

A recently released expansion for Rebirth, Afterbirth provides a completely new game mode, called Greed mode, which happens to be quite fun, although you’ll need a lot of time to complete it as every character. It also introduced alternate floors, each with unique soundtrack, new enemies that will enrage you, a bunch of new items that are mostly fine by me, although some are weak. There is also a new character, that is quite different from the others by being blindfolded and making the run much different (but not too much) in the items you’ll find desirable. There is also 10 new challenges, many of which are much more difficult than the previous 20, and will occupy your time.

*Closing comments

With a ton of new content, an excellent soundtrack and a wonderful expansion, Rebirth is a must have for anyone who enjoyed the original, although as always I’d recommend waiting for a sale as the price can be a little high, compared to similar indie games, but more than worth it.

"Yay cancer!" - just Binding of Isaac quotes

The Binding of Isaac is a Flash-based roguelike dungeon crawler reminiscent of early Legend of Zelda games developed by Edmund McMillen and Florian Himsl. Inspired heavily from the Biblical story, the game follows Isaac (and a variety of unlockable characters) escaping from his Christian fundamentalist Mother, to whom a voice of God commands to sacrifice Isaac.

* Gameplay

After escaping from his Mother’s wrath, Isaac finds himself in a basement filled with monsters. Each floor contains a set amount of rooms culminating with a boss fight that must be cleared in order to advance to the next floor. Along the way Isaac can collect pennies (nickels and dimes as variants) to spend in a Shop or an Arcade, bombs to blow up obstacles or enemies and keys to unlock chests and Treasure rooms. The items found in Treasure rooms, after completing a boss fight and other ways are the core to improving Isaac’s tears (bullets) and fighting abilities. For example, an item can make tears homing, poisonous, increase damage and so on. My favourite is the Ipecac item, which makes your tears explosive and always poisonous. If requirements are fulfilled, Isaac can after a boss fight trade his heart containers to the Devil in exchange for powerful items, or alternatively, avoid taking deals with the Devil to acquire a chance for an Offering from an Angel (Wrath of the Lamb DLC required) which can be useful as well. The game at first seems very difficult, but as it is completed more and more times, new items, characters, alternate bosses and floors can be unlocked, ensuring there will always be a reason to explore. The game also features many references to McMillen’s other games, such as Super Meat Boy and Time ♥♥♥♥, as well as popular games such as Super Mario, Legend of Zelda and others.

* Expansions and the community

While the base game is fairly extensive, I heavily recommend obtaining Wrath of the Lamb DLC, which adds 98 new items, a new character, new floors and many other content that improve the experience. Owning said DLC is a prerequisite for the Eternal Update, a free addon developed by Florian Himsl that adds Hard mode, which offers a brutal experience for those feeling the base game was too easy. The Binding of Isaac is very popular and well known, as a result from famous Youtube Let’s Players such as Northernlion and Bisnap. Their unique ways of playing the game have inspired many more to try the game themselves.

* Closing comments

The Binding of Isaac is a very charming (although rather macabre as well) game which is a must have for anyone interested in roguelikes. It can be obtained for 99 cents from Humble Bundles or Steam sales, DLC and awesome soundtrack included. A worthwhile play even after the release of Rebirth.

"It's time I told the world of your sins." - proclamation of denouncement, once a game

Sid Meier's Civilization V is the latest game developed by Firaxis of the main Civilization series and one of the best examples of the 4X genre. Since release, many DLC have been released, but most attention goes to 2 expansion packs, Gods & Kings and Brave New World, each adding much needed content to the somewhat lacking base game.

* Gameplay

Similar to the previous titles in the series, V gives you the leading role of a civilization starting in 4000 BC with a Settler to found your first city and a military unit. From there, you must guide your civilization to glory using diplomacy, war, culture, trade, religion, science and espionage. Each civilization is based on a real world culture and appropriate advantages, unique units, buildings and so on. The goal of each game is to emerge supreme in one of 4 victory conditions: Diplomacy, Domination, Culture and Science. If neither is fulfilled by the year 2050, a Time victory is given to the civilization with most points. Opposing you are, depending on choice, from 1 to 15 rival civilizations with fairly decent AI, regardless of difficulty, although they sometimes make questionable choices. Strategy and tactics are thus important, whether is it in city placement, unit position or expanding cultural options. In each game, several resources have to be taken care of:

• Gold (pays for the upkeep, instant building, as bribe in diplomacy)
  
• Happiness (prevents revolts and enables Golden Ages)
  
• Strategic resources (allows powerful units and buildings)
  
• Culture (for Social Policies that give empire-wide boosts, further expanded with Ideologies)

All of this leads to many hours spent in intricate detail planning of synergies. And of course, if you ever get stuck on a question, the ingame Civilopedia is a vast source of information laced with many sarcastic remarks.

* Expansions, scenarios and custom content

As mentioned, many DLC have been released for V, ranging from new civilizations, maps, scenarios and game overhauls (Gods & Kings and Brave New World). Personally, I believe having both expansions and new civilizations adding content are a must for anyone looking to invest a significant amount of time in the game, although the map packs are fairly redundant and can be downloaded for free from the Steam Workshop. There are also many scenarios based on historic events, with many changes from a regular game and there are also many mods for download, ranging from simple UI changes to adding completely new content and civilizations (often fictional).

* Closing comments

Sid Meier’s Civilization V is an excellent game which offers many hours of enjoyable gameplay, but I recommend having most DLC’s as the base game is lacking in content. However, prices are rather high, thus it is best to wait for a sale. The game also offers at least 4 hours of beautiful made-for-the-game soundtrack. A must-have game for anyone who has an interest in history, strategy and micromanagement and a lot better than Beyond Earth.

"sooka blyat noob report" - your average friendly Russians
"Well played!" - chat bind used in a mocking way
"DROP YOUR STICK"- EternaLEnVy leading his team in a professional way

Dota 2 is the leading game of the MOBA (multiplayer online battle arena) genre developed by Valve Software, released in 2011. In Dota 2, players in teams of five control various heroes and abilities in a bid to utterly crush the enemy in a pointless waste of 30-60 minutes.

* Gameplay

Dota 2 largely follows the experience of the original Dota All Stars mod: you pick a hero of your choice and get assigned to the Radiant or Dire (formerly known as Sentinel and Scourge) faction with the objective of destroying the enemy's Ancient. Protecting the Ancients is maintained by towers and barracks which ensure lane equilibrium and creep strength. Heroes are initially very weak and must rely on creeps (faceless grunts) to obtain starting gold from which options to start pushing begin, as well as experience which enables leveling up abilities. Abilities range from:

• Deal damage (and maybe a status effect)
  
• Inflict a positive or negative buff
  
• Area of effect damage/positive or negative buff
  
• Utilities
  
• Global effects

While laning is the main way to gain gold and experience, alternate choices are fighting neutral creeps in the jungle (usually done by very specific heroes) or challenging the mighty Roshan, who drops the fabled Aegis of the Immortal (resurrect on death). In order to maintain the advantage, certain nuances of the game must be learned:

• Last hitting/denying (ensuring/denying gold and experience)
  
• Camp stacking (having a single jungle camp hold more creeps than intended)
  
• Creep pull (having allied and neutral creeps fight each other to shift lane equilibrium)
  
• Map vision (prevents ambushes)

Of course, having a good Dota 2 experience is defined by your teammates, who may be either incompetent or singlehandedly taking on the entire enemy team and winning. Communication and teamwork are vital, thus it is recommended to play with friends, although it doesn't ensure victory.

* Hero roles and balance

Each hero has a set of 4 abilities that have synergy with each other or other heroes' abilities, but more importantly, each has a specific role:

• Carry/hard carry - heroes that need a lot of gold and levels to get the ball rolling
  
• Support/hard support - heroes that excel at supporting carries in early stage, and usually buy support items and stack camps
  
• Jungler - heroes that spend early game in jungle, then ambushing lanes at level 6

A hero is not forced to follow a role, although using highly unorthodox tactics will most likely earn you the scorn of your team, possibly giving you a trip to the low priority queue, filled with Russians and similar friendly people. Dota 2 often changes with large updates that give heroes buffs or nerfs, change certain mechanics or simply iron out bugs and glitches. The most popular heroes tend to be the ones that have an easy way of dominating games, making you have a hard time if they aren't on your team, although learning to counter them is a great learning experience.

* Other interests in Dota 2

If you get bored (and you will) of right clicking at the time, the game offers the option of following various e-sport leagues, the biggest being the yearly International hosted by Valve, and famous players (such as Dendi, EternaLEnVy and so on) which set many gameplay trends and strategies. There is also the large economy which is mostly based on altering the looks of heroes and the game, but with no pay-to-win options, except maybe gaudy gold cosmetics. Finally, every Chinese New Year/Halloween/Christmas a slightly different game mode is introduced, thus making the game slightly less stale.

* Closing comments

Dota 2 is a fairly well made game which offers many hours of play, although the relatively unchanging experience and hostile people may spoil your enjoyment. Personally, I wouldn't suggest getting too involved as you will become highly misanthropic, although I wouldn't say it is a bad game.

"After nine years in development, hopefully it would have been worth the wait." - Gabe Newell

Team Fortress 2 is a first person fast-paced team-based shooter developed by Valve Software that combines the fun of killing people with colourful animated graphics. Still going strong after 8 years, TF2 offers an easy way to lose time in multiple game modes and collecting hats.

* Gameplay

Following an old school Quake based formula of having multiple distinct classes in a FPS, TF2 gives everyone something to play:

• Scout for the abrasive and impatient people
  
• Soldier for the crazed American patriots
  
• Pyro for the people who like going forward
  
• Demo's your Man for the explosive and knightly joy
  
• Heavy for the type who likes an easygoing experience
  
• Engineer for those that love to whack their Jag
  
• Medic for the upcoming graduates of medicine with a sadistic streak
  
• Sniper for the person who loves following a trend
  
• Spy if you love getting behind other people

Classes have an interesting synergy and counters which are expressed through various game modes such as Capture the Flag, Attack/Defend, Special Delivery and achievement_idle. Personally, I prefer most Payload and Control Points. With a healthy variety of maps, games can last from 2 minutes to 2 hours, if your local Engineers feel particularly lazy. If the default game modes aren't your thing, there's always Mann vs. Machine, a mode reminiscent of Killing Floor (Tour of Duty tickets recommended), except with ever predictable robots, or you can download custom mods such as Dodgeball, Trade Plaza, Prop Hunt and so on.

* Weapons and balance

All classes have a variety of unlockable weapons that change the way a class is played in an interesting/infuriating way or simply switch some subtle numbers. While there's no blatantly overpowered weapons, although certain classes become very powerful for a short time, until Valve brings back the righteous balance. Sometimes, they don't even do that, for the cases of Gunslinger and Splendid Screen. I do not have an issue playing with or against slightly overpowered items, as learning to counter is the reward itself. Classes maintain synergies and counters despite unlockable weapons, although the average public server heavily favours stacking certain classes such as Scout rush, Soldier/Demoman explosive spam, Heavies, Engineer camps or the ever deadly Sniper squads. For a more fair play, there's plenty of competitive leagues and matches, even if it's less popular.

* Trading and economy

It is impossible to mention TF2 without bringing up the many ways you can customize your classes, from the fairly simple kill counting weapons to the classy/garish/charming/pretentious hats that alter the way your class looks, to the amazement/scorn of other people. The most valuable items are the tacky unusuals, which cost a sizeable portion of your disposable income, but they ensure a pocket Medic wherever you go (not to be confused with a cosmetic). I find that collecting hats is one of the more enjoyable things you can do, if the shooting becomes slightly boring. The economy is simple to grasp, although don't expect to get a discount from other people. Furthermore, it might be difficult to start because of the high key price, which is at time of the writing 19.33 refined metal, which equates to 174 scrap or 348 weapons.

* Closing comments

While being somewhat neglected in favour in comparison to Dota 2 and Counter Strike: Global Offensive, TF2 has remained a great way to spend Summers, one ctf_2fort match at a time. Newcomers should be vary of fairly high system requirements (due to outdated Source code) and slightly hostile environment for newbies. I recommend it as a first game for people starting on Steam, as you can find great friends, have fun and being exploring the wider Steam community.