Me and my 16-year-old female brother realised that we are both attracted to bread.

My brother found a really cute piece of bread and started dating it. I was furious.
A voice in my head started saying, "Kill him, kill your brother," and after a while... I caved in.

I grabbed a large metal hammer and started beating the absolute ♥♥♥♥ out of him.
"How dare you get a hotter piece of bread than me!" I screamed.

Eventually, he died. I was satisfied until I realized something...
I had stepped on the bread, crushing it completely...
I'm currently lying on the ground, bawling my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ eyes out.

I really hope that my parents don't find out about what I did...