For pretzel enthusiasts and eaters.

Merriam-Webster defines a pretzel as "a brittle or chewy glazed usually salted slender bread often shaped like a loose knot" ("Pretzel"). That is not a pretzel. The embodiment of this aliment is minute; consequently similar to the cliche of deciding a book's readability by looking at the outer shell. The true meaning, however, is derived from the aura of nostalgia and deep meaning that envelops this tasty morsel. Pretzels represent childhood: munching hard pretzels as a snack before the teeball game. Pretzels also reveal development and coming of age. As one progresses through life, hard pretzels before a sporting performance transform into the soft pretzels of the concessions at professional events. The soft pretzels one can buy on the streets of crowding metropolises. The soft pretzels which demolish the hard in a battle of palatability. Yet, as one realizes, hard pretzels are still very much edible. The hard pretzels of youth and adversity are near and dear to many a heart. Pretzels of all hardness and softness alike are irreplaceable. Hungry, pretzel-loving mouths would be insatiable without the tasty, salty morsel dubbed the pretzel. Pretzel Pals respect and glorify the pretzel. Pretzel Pals represent the pretzel throughout all hardship and for all eternity.