Coolest/Funniest Stories from any Civ (I, II, III, IV, V) games?

[Historious]

So what are your favorite memories of playing Civ? Old, new, or even current? Civ stories can be redicously funny, or epic, and sometimes both.

EDIT: Well... For funny this just happened for me:

So, I attempt to start building a neutral-tall-single-city-nation, and I remained neutral for most of the game, up until Russia took over Brussels. To get the Liberation Bonus, I thought would be a nice perk (and my foreign adviser was advising war (seriously, out of all the advisers on a rank of who's a warmonger, she takes first)). So with Nuclear Non-Proflieration Treaty in play soon, I stock piled 8 Atomic Bombs.

I demanded Russia hand over Brussels, three times, once each turn.
They refused me.

So from no where I dropped a nuke on Moscow killing around 4 million citizens in one attack.
I asked again several turns later for peace, and the city... They did a first strike tactic, and nuked one of my cities, killing 2.5 million citizens, and destroying 2 nukes.

From there... Stuff got interesting.

I dropped 2 nukes: 1 on Moscow killing another 2 million (and their space program), and the other on a city just south on Brussels, killing yet another 2 million citizens. I really didn't want this to happen.

But, alas, no surrender.

I dropped one nuke on Brussels, killing a million. I was hoping that it would be less appealing to Russia, with the fallout, and all so that they would be more likely to give it up.

Nope.

One nuke on Brussels later, and .8 million dead, I deployed paratroopers on the city, took it, and now I'm their best friend, despite shrinking their population down to 6,000 people, and irradiating the landscape.

The other Civs don't seem to have a problem with it though...

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Here's one of my more serious ones: I call this the Vassal Wars:

One time in Civ IV I made a game with the donut looking map, and played as Rome (I think).

Anyways I ended up being very peaceful, and the most powerful Civ on the planet. Almost everyone wanted to be my Vassal (a greatly missed thing from Civ V). Hannibal, the second most powerful asked for Vassalage after I defeated Stalin, and made him my Vassal.
Then everyone wanted Vassalage.

After America declared war on the Vikings I couldn't get to them in time, so the Vikings were almost wiped out, but I defeated America completely.
Arabia (I believe) renounced Vassalage, as well as Carthage, and the Zulus.
I didn't stand for it.

Nukes rained down on Arabia irradiating the land, making it unusable.
My invasion commensed by the North after conquering one of Arabia's friends. It was a fight that took well over 300 years.
Then I fought with the Vikings, and Zulus and they caputilated.
Hannibal terrorized everyone, and no army from the land would conquer them after several attempts at it.

So, while playing the song "Normandy" from Once Upon A Matress I began building up a fleet so large D-Day looked pale in comparison. I swept through after a few hundred years of raising the fleet, and conquered everything, and sparing no cities. (Burn, baby, burn.)
Hannibal wouldn't come under my rule again so he turned to China, the Aztecs and Japan... And the Zulus.

The Zulus revolted, and my forces were all where Carthage had once been. I swept through China, making them caputilate, and declare war on the former Alliance. China entered Nuclear War with the Aztecs.

A few hundred Intercontinental Ballistic Missles later, and the Aztecs came under my influence for the first time as my Vassal.

I destroyed the last city of Carthage being harbored by Japan, and currently am still atempting to resolve the problem.

Also, with all the Nukes going off, the Fallout has turned the world into pretty much a big desert.

So, what are some of the Coolest/Funniest stories you've had in any Civ game?

[Historious]

Well... For funny this just happened for me:

So, I attempt to start building a neutral-tall-single-city-nation, and I remained neutral for most of the game, up until Russia took over Brussels. To get the Liberation Bonus, I thought would be a nice perk (and my foreign adviser was advising war (seriously, out of all the advisers on a rank of who's a warmonger, she takes first)). So with Nuclear Non-Proflieration Treaty in play soon, I stock piled 8 Atomic Bombs.

I demanded Russia hand over Brussels, three times, once each turn.
They refused me.

So from no where I dropped a nuke on Moscow killing around 4 million citizens in one attack.
I asked again several turns later for peace, and the city... They did a first strike tactic, and nuked one of my cities, killing 2.5 million citizens, and destroying 2 nukes.

From there... Stuff got interesting.

I dropped 2 nukes: 1 on Moscow killing another 2 million (and their space program), and the other on a city just south on Brussels, killing yet another 2 million citizens. I really didn't want this to happen.

But, alas, no surrender.

I dropped one nuke on Brussels, killing a million. I was hoping that it would be less appealing to Russia, with the fallout, and all so that they would be more likely to give it up.

Nope.

One nuke on Brussels later, and .8 million dead, I deployed paratroopers on the city, took it, and now I'm their best friend, despite shrinking their population down to 6,000 people, and irradiating the landscape.

The other Civs don't seem to have a problem with it though...

[Nekoborg]

When Napoleon confessed he attacked Florence (which I was allied with from gold gifts and maxed out patronage policy tree). Then I replied he would pay for it, then he mouthed off to me saying he was confident in his decision to declare war on Florence.

With 2 ships of the line and 3 longbow men in the area, I gifted Florence the units to see if a city-state could win.

Several turns later and 1 city less he wanted to talk again. He said he was about to take their city and it would make a good addition to his lands, when he had just lost one of his own cities to them, which Florence was razing as we spoke.

Several turns later Paris was sighed …… defeated by a city-state, giggles.
It doesn’t pay to be over confident, does it?

The French never learn, never mess with Longbow men, they pluck yue, ROFL

[uuuhdavid]

Well, for starters. It's called having the launcher crash and uninstall for the first time playing.

Ha.

[wormhog]

Pangea, playing as the huns. spawned next to a ton of ruins, my first warrior got upgraded to a battering ram. I built a second warrior and he too got upgraded. I went around the map and destroyed 6 out of 8 civs with these 2 battering rams. I won a domination victory before turn 150. Nuff said.

[Eifersucht18]

Since no ones done it yet :)


Cool Story Bro (j/king)

[uuuhdavid]

引用自 Eifersucht18：

Since no ones done it yet :)


Cool Story Bro (j/king)

get your memes out of here

[Fat Ungrateful Squirrel]

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=300024242

This is Why I think Civilzation and Mods are the two greatest things.

[Historious]

引用自 Noble Jackal：

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=300024242

This is Why I think Civilzation and Mods are the two greatest things.

What the ♥♥♥♥ did you just say about me, you little ♥♥♥♥♥?

[Fat Ungrateful Squirrel]

Oh, and theres a mod for stuff like vassals.
http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=141452526

[uuuhdavid]

引用自 Noble Jackal：

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=300024242

This is Why I think Civilzation and Mods are the two greatest things.

Kill that brony ♥♥♥♥♥♥. Nuke her country.

[Historious]

引用自 One DOOMed Marine：

引用自 Noble Jackal：

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=300024242

This is Why I think Civilzation and Mods are the two greatest things.

Kill that brony ♥♥♥♥♥♥. Nuke her country.

VIVE LA HUMANITY, DEATH TO THE PONIES.

[uuuhdavid]

引用自 Valkoorcelts：

引用自 One DOOMed Marine：

Kill that brony ♥♥♥♥♥♥. Nuke her country.

VIVE LA HUMANITY, DEATH TO THE PONIES.

god I love civ V

[AlexanderA4x]

My first game of civ was Denmark playing on Earth spawning alone in America.
Venice spawned on the coast between Russia and China.
Morocco spawned in France.
Poland spawned in South Africa.

I wonderspammed and stayed on my continent until i researced battleships and lost The Forbidden Palace to a unknown civ (Venice).

I made my empire go from wonderspamming to a warfactory powered by a whole games gold that could make even Stalin, Winston Churchill and U.S.A. jealous of me.

I sent out 10 battleships and 1 destroyer to secure a beach head in Normandie.
I freed Moroccos capital, got open borders and revealed the map, the result was horrifying, Poland had conquered the world so it looked like Hitlers 3rd reich, except Russia got to live.

I sent 4 carriers fully loaded with nukes and 4 carriers loaded with fighters, 10 destroyers, 50 mecanized infantry, 25 artillery, 3 generals, 1 admiral and 40 battleships just to take out Polands capital.
I decided to send 1 nuclear missile across the sea 10 ballistic 10 bombers, and then 10 destroyers 100 battleships.

And so i won the game.