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1) Define "static"
2) The map has a lot more to it than you think it does
3) The map isn't that big when you get into the late game, it becomes very small very quickly.
4) It's repeative in trash tiers or tiers where drooling idiots have no idea how to play
In mid/high level games it can be a really interesting game of out thinking the enemy team. You need to know the finer mechanics to appreciate it.
5) Experience points mean very little. And I would rather the boundry be increased for new players going into ranked, since people dive in as soon as ranked unlocks and they feed every game. AT which point they come here and cry about how Dota is broken.
Judging by the way you wrote, " I know this was a mod for Warcraft III, and that's the experience - I felt like I was playing some kind-of-ok mod...", you obviously have never played Warcraft 3, and have no idea what you're talking about. In additon to that, you expected people to think that you were trolling, and you also expected hate. This is a sure sign that you have been playing Dota 2 for a long time (no, I didn't bother to look at your play time) and you know what to expect from this toxic community.
I've found that the best way to have fun is to 100% ignore the MMR, leveling, and experiance systems, and just foucus on saying "Hi" to your team at the beginning of the match, and wishing everyone luck and a fun time. Then, after that, foucusing on which hero to play that will go along with what everyone else is doing.
One of the only reasons why the hype for this game is so high (which, as you may have read, isn't my reason, so I may be wrong) is because of the compeditive aspect. People from around the world compete for more money than many make in months, and because of this, anyone who doesn't perform to these "professional wanna be's" standards', is put off as inferrior, which will make many who just want to enjoy the game put it off as not very fun.
"And to actually play in a ranked match you have to be several levels ahead..."
Who in their right mind plays ranked matches? Those are just an excuse for parties of people to foucus (and waste) all of their energy on their MMR, rank, and level, by winning using whatever means possible, weather it be throwing tactics out the window, or playing the mind games: disrespecting the other team, or passing off some rather impressive feats of skill as luck.
"The controls feel static, and the maps are boring and not innovative and are way too big for the spawn points."
The map is non-innovative? Compared to what maps? What map do you use as an "innovative standard map" to base all maps off of?! There is a subtle asymetry between the two halves of radiant and dire that gives both sides equal advantages and disadvantages. It is innovative because in the bottom lane, there is a stairway leading to the main highway where the entire enemy team can hide. It is innovative because in the radiant jungle, there is a few trees that stop you from seeing potential gankers that'll take you down on your way back to the fountain. If the controls feel static, then change them. You can change every hotkey there is in the options or via the consol.
Everyone has their own cup of tea. If you leave, I'll still have a million people to keep me company.
Maybe play bots first and learn the characters before jumping into the game online?
I will tell you one of the main reasons why I love this game:
110 Heroes to choose from + 10 heroes per match = 46,897,636,623,981 different possible lineups.
That's right, almost 47 Trillion different ways the game will be played out, not counting different item builds.
Every single match is unique, brings a different experience, and you always have something to learn from.
With little over 1 hour of in game time I think you are judging it way too early. That would be like watching the first couple mins of a movie and wondering why everyone loved it.
*community sees wall of text* "Nope.avi"
Well not everyone like to read that much like u said and some times shorter is better.
I can share my experience as gamer since 1990 and coder since 1995 (so i know math pretty well). I play Dota since WC3 map and i was pro some years. And it's still attract me with it's replay-ability, complexity and dynamics. I played lots of games in that 32 years so i can make valuable comparisons.
One thing to note that solo/random party Dota and stable team Dota (pro level or lower) is two different games sharing graphical image only. First more like some custom mode.