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Thats actually a more recent addition to the harvest moon franchise realtivly.
Perhaps a solution would just be able to name your character whatever you want, since you can't really tell the gender in first person it would be up to the player to decide their gender.
Because those are all finished games, going to the Nintendo forums and saying that you'd like the option to play a girl in Ocarina of Time has no chance of accomplishing anything, the game is already made and has been for quite a few years. This game, by contrast, is not, it's an incomplete early access game, with one of the main selling points of early access being to give you the chance to offer feedback and suggestions to the developers. Unlike any of the games you mentioned the game is in development and user feedback can be implemented.
Also the OP isn't even complaining, at all, they're making a suggestion for a feature they would like to see and complimenting the game.
http://support.kleientertainment.com/customer/portal/articles/948100-multiplayer-in-don-t-starve
The game does use gender specific pronouns in Starmails, but that wouldn't really be that hard to tweak in order to make those pronouns interchangeable.
And in regards to multiplayer, wouldn't be the first game where everyone's a female character in a multiplayer game. See Sanctum. Everyone's a color-variation of Skye in that game. Probably other games I can't think of off the top of my head too. And of course there's every multiplayer game where everyone's a dude, for comparison.
And let them make their own decisions, like whether or not they want to implement any given suggestion.
Im personally not called beatrix so it threw me when the mail was referncing a name i never selected.