Third Shortcut - Hired Hand is a Ridiculous Task

[Typhoon]

I've gotta rant on this. I've been attempting to finish out the third shortcut with the Old Bitey Hired Hand method. I haven't been this furious and frustrated in any game in recent memory.

What makes it a truly hellish labor is the damn AI, these Hired Hands run and jump around like a cat on cocaine chasing a mouse. They are, impressively, efficient at killing themselves.

I mean, wow.

Whether it's homing in on the nearest spikes or the closest bear trap, or hitting a 10-point dive into the hot rock soup at 4-3, they're dead far before I get a chance to do the deed myself. I don't want my precious bald man-baby leaping from my sweaty arms into sure death every 6 seconds. Carrying him through the level dealing with this "wriggling" makes me want to chew gravel and broken glass.

Does anyone have any tips on stained glass flavors keeping this suicidal maniac alive? I've tried trapping him in inescapable situations, only to have him teleport to me later (into sure death). I love the game like everyone else, but **** me sideways with a broom I'm at my wits end, Derek!

[FDru]

Doesn't the big fish drop one right before the door you need to go through for the shortcut? Could have sworn that's how I did it...

Otherwise you pretty much just drop him into a spot where he can't escape.

[Morango]

Here's one way to do it:

Go to Abzu on 4-3 through the tidepool level, go into the lake and rescue the character in there. It'll be a hired hand that then you can leave with, and give it to the shortcut lady.

[qbicfeet]

It's been a while since I unlocked this shortcut but I'm pretty sure I carried him while placing him down and immediately picking him up again every four or so seconds to reset the timer. Just focus on getting to the exit ASAP and jump past any enemies in your immediate path or use bombs or ropes wastefully to get rid of them.

[Jakkauli]

There's always a hired hand in 4-1, just use the shortcut and speedrun to 4-4. And what qbicfeet said, you can carry him, just drop him down every few seconds so he doesn't jump away.

[doorpedal]

Honestly i have to agree, that task took me 50+ tries but golden key from dwellings took 2 tries.

[Dingbat]

Originally posted by Morango:

Here's one way to do it:

Go to Abzu on 4-3 through the tidepool level, go into the lake and rescue the character in there. It'll be a hired hand that then you can leave with, and give it to the shortcut lady.

Second this suggestion. Did this task thru this.

[CarThief]

My own improvised take on the situation was...
1> Start at Olmec shortcut to begin at Tidepool level 1.

2> Rope security guy at Tusk's gambling stall (easy & safe way to stun him), use the pole to your advantadge to jump on either of them and eventually get the shotgun. It's always in the first level. This won't anger regular shopkeepers.

3> Get to the level with the giant fish, and start blastin'. Though after like 3 blasts to the face it might die, so from there on, aim low so you don't also blast the hired help that spawns from the fish as he swims up immediately. (Ideally also clear the other fish beforehand so he won't become fish food.)

4> Pick up and gently drop your hired help to take a nap. With some luck he'll stay put, aparrantly you need to clear out nearby enemies or he'll wake up and get himself killed fighting them. Use that shotgun to clear the area and the path to the exit. As long as the suicidal helper is alive, he gets brought along when you exit, so leave him be and pray. A lot. Like, REALLY A LOT.

Took a few tries but it got me the shortcut. Honestly, the Udjat Eye Key was easier. Keys don't try to kill themselves or wriggle themselves out from your grip to land in some spike pit or worse.
Edit: Though i heard others just whipped/bombed the fish from a cheesy safe spot. That could work too if you hate fighting Tusk's bodyguard. Dunno what the safe spot is though.

[Plan Z]

Completed this from the 1-4 shortcut, using the hired hand in the coffin there, and went through Volcana / Tide Pool. If you pick up and put down the hired hand a few times, he'll run around for a bit and then fall asleep. If you book it through the level after he falls asleep, he'll stay put. You can use this trick to effectively strand him at the beginning of each level and keep him safe.

[Forblaze]

Originally posted by Plan Z:

Completed this from the 4-1 shortcut, using the hired hand in the coffin there, and went through Volcana / Tide Pool. If you pick up and put down the hired hand a few times, he'll run around for a bit and then fall asleep. If you book it through the level after he falls asleep, he'll stay put. You can use this trick to effectively strand him at the beginning of each level and keep him safe.

I wasn't able to consistently get him to stay asleep. He'd either wake up when i was midway through the level and catch back up to me at some point or I just wouldn't see him at the level complete screen (presumably because he woke up and died trying to get to me).

I think the best strat, which is the one I used, is to get the hired hand from the fish on 4-2 and just have enough bombs to blow through 4-3 and 4-4.

Originally posted by CarThief:

Edit: Though i heard others just whipped/bombed the fish from a cheesy safe spot. That could work too if you hate fighting Tusk's bodyguard. Dunno what the safe spot is though.

Inside of the wooden structure in the bottom right corner.

[Lunacy]

I think you can drop them down to make them sleep then speedrun the level?

[MaxAstro]

Hired hands will stay asleep unless an enemy walks within half a screen of them. So you need to put him to sleep somewhere no enemies can get to him (jungle might actually be easier for this, because of magma men wandering around in volcana).

Putting them to sleep at the start of the level is definitely the easy way to do this run, though. That or kill the fish in 4-2.

[AP WOLRD 5 MANIFEST TRUST IN GOD]

If possible, Azbu is the easiest way to keep a hired hand alive. I used co-op to get there without the Ankh (you can probably use a ghost to detonate the boxes of tnt if you get low enough to see them, or keep a player by the place where you enter the tunnel that leads to the bottom and have them exit when you do). The hired hand is in the water below, and you can just run to the exit