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If you want a more dungeon-enduring experience, DS2 is the way to go. They have stronger penalties for dying (HP reduces each death) and the game is far more PvP balanced (roll dodging is expensive on stamina, and poise is more valuable). Sadly, invasions don't happen very often, but there are arenas you can queue for.
DS3 is nicknamed "Casual Souls" by the hardcore DS community. It stripped out a large portion of the survival aspects of the game. There is no penalty for dying other than dropped souls (already part of the other games), and all the stats are completely unbalanced (cheap roll dodging makes most builds obsolete / not worth it). Estus flask recovery is way more plentiful (by mid-game you'll have 10+ uses that near-full heal you). Invasions are more frequent, but the PvP is more frustrating and tiresome.
However, DS3 comes with way better AI, faster enemies, and more exciting bosses. If you're a DS1 fan, you'll enjoy the familiar setting. Lastly, there are additional special attacks with weapons, giving you a bit more control over combat.
Arguably, DS2 is "better", simply because it is closer to the original DS1 experience. But if you don't like "punishing" gameplay or you prefer better graphics / spam-style combat, DS3 would be better for you.
Anyone who disagrees is objectively wrong
DS2 is an awesome game (specially in the weapons/armor department)
Dying in DS3 can't hardly have a real penalty because the avg person shouldn't be dying a lot unless their build is total trash. HP is simply too powerful until later NG+s allowing to much room for mistakes to be made. Stamina scaling is too potent as well. Over half the bosses have glaring flaws rendering them nigh impossible to die to if you have any sense of observation.
In addition, you see the mention of roll spam and other nonsense for DS3 too often but DS2 has superior rolling mechanics. Greater i-frames, actual rolling techniques (meaning roll is more powerful in DS2 from a mechanical point), and same stamina consumption. One of the reasons people mistaken it is due to incorrectly rolling in DS2 which causes INCREASED stamina drain when in reality they are actually executing a special roll unwittingly that has benefits but drains additional stamina.
Dark Souls 3 has 13 iframes at default, boosts to 16 iframes at the cost of taking 30% more dmg (with Carthus Bloodring, using a ring slot). Dark Souls 2 starts with 5 at 85 agility but it doesn't take much to increase it very quickly. A naked deprived can reach 13 iframes (105 agility) in 26 levels into adaptability which is, honestly, nothing. You can boost to 15-16 iframes with significant stat investment at no major penalty, tho good players don't need it (honestly even bad players shouldn't really). Granted, the difference between 13 iframes and 15-16 is almost straight cheating in PvE if anyone has tried playing with that much iframes or Carthus Bloodring (in DS3).
Infinite poise in DS2 isn't exactly "balanced" which is why the hyper armor change was made. Hyper armor doesn't work flawlessly in DS3 but it is in a much better state than DS2 and gives reason to also utilize Perserverance with the poise changes. I mean, unless you love your havel monsters and thus want to disagree for some reason...
Estus heal FAR more health in DS2 than DS3. DS2 starts at 550 healing vs DS3's 300. It has only 5 upgrades and goes up to a cap of 800 vs DS3's 720. Btw, these were with Estus Ring numbers... DS3 ACTUALLY starts at 250 base, caps at 600 base (100 more MAX than the STARTING healing of DS2's rank 0 Estus). With minor stat upgrades you also can chug Estus just as fast (there are videos verifying this with them side by side). In terms of healing potential DS2 is clearly more casual than DS3 but both are, honeslty way to casual. Oh, and you shouldn't even be taking dmg in DS2 in the first place because of how slow paced combat is (as I like to put it, basically a cheat code for infinite bullet time from a Max Payne game).
However, DS2 combat is so much slower to the point you could honestly PvE butt naked with little difficulty. If you are getting hit you are probably either physically passing out mid fight or a total newbie to action games. You should be dying even LESS in DS2 & 1.
Btw, this isn't to hate on you. You clearly like the entire franchise so I'm not assuming you are bias so much as just me correcting some misconceptions that are surprisingly wide spread.
All DS games are pretty casual though so, in the end, I don't think it really matters much. A solid entry into the hardcore genre even if they barely, or arguably do not, qualify as hardcore/challenging games.
while only a few areas of 3 feel like a chore, all but a few areas in 2 feels like a chore, I would prefer 1 to 2
and that dosent even begin to mention turdhorse valley