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Otherwise there is both a level and a weaponslevel based restriction. If they don't match closely enough in the same ranges, you will get less connections and visibility except to players in the same ranges. Usually ranges are pretty good but you probably are not in the same level ranges.
"Summon Sign Ranges" https://eldenring.wiki.fextralife.com/Summon+Range+Calculator
Is the area boss alive?
Do you have same multiplayer password?
Did the host use furlcalling finger remedy?
Is summoning allowed in an area where host is?
If at least one answer is NO, then you won't be able to connect.
Also, if either host or summonee was banned for cheating or using mods, you wouldn't be able to connect either
i still see messages and blood pools implying there is an existing internet connection tho? my messages are being appraised still too
Just saying though, that's exactly what happens when you banned. You can still see all the bloodstains etc, you just can't participate in multiplayer