STOP SHOOTING STUFF (PART 2 OF THE ESSENTIAL GUIDES)

This is part 2 in my advanced techniques series and will enable you to STOP SHOOTING STUFF in Borderlands 2
Please ensure that you are already an expert in the art of SHOOTING STUFF before attempting this dangerous second part.

SHOOTING STUFF GUIDE

USE AT YOUR OWN RISK!

1. NOT SHOOTING

This section is intended to enable you to STOP SHOOTING stuff.

This technique should only be attemped by at least level 6 graduates of the SHOOTING STUFF
method described in my first guide.

SHOOTING STUFF GUIDE

For this advanved method we must again use the "MOUSE" and "FINGER" as displayed below.

Fig.1 MOUSE










Fig.2 FINGER










Please I beg you to look out for these imposters and excersise caution as poking one with the other could have disasterous results

Fig.3 IMPOSTERS
















To achieve the required STOP SHOOTING phase the following action must be followed
Take the afore mentioned "FINGER" from the "MOUSE"'s "LEFT" button

Fig.4 LEFT MOUSE BUTTON UN-PRESS











This if executed correctly it should stop the explosions, screaming & banging noises, however this only functions within the game and will not stop the noises in your head.

2. UN-ZOOMING

This section needs only be attempted if you chose to use the optional "ZOOM" section in guide 1

Please refer to section 1 of this guide and repeat all except Fig.4

instead please use this technique

Fig. 5 UN-ZOOM









this method should allow you to "UN-ZOOM" and revert to a relaxed gun state. much like Texas.

WARNING DO NOT PROCEED FURTHER WITHOUT PARENTAL CONSENT AND/OR MEDICAL INSURANCE!

it is rumoured to be possible for only the most experienced of stop shooters and un-zoomers to achieve the double wammy, the "symulstopshootnunzoom"TM

this dangerous manoeuver can be done if you have prevously qualified to at least level 10 proficiency on all previous guide levels.

below is an illustration of the technique.

I will not include written instructions as injuries caused by attempting this method too early has disfigured my hands and will not allow me to type the correct words.











Please note that the "MOUSE" is inverted in all images on its horizontal axis
Do not un-invert along the vertical, this may cause retina burn on laser mouses, although if using optical or ball mouseses the danger is considerably lower

DANGER POSSIBLE LASER DAMAGE

3. STOP AIMING

"STOP AIMING" is one of the simplest techniques within these advanced user guides.

This method will allow you to go from a state of "AIMING" to a state of "STOP AIMING"

There are however 2 distinct schools of the art (one more difficult than the other)

Method 1 (beginners)
This method simply uses the ancient Japaneese art of "handmouseoffy" which to the layman simply means removing the hand from the mouse, as shown below.






















Method 2 (advanced)
This advanced method uses a lesser know Tibetan technique taught to me by the Monks of ancient art
The technique translates as "stillmousehand" and can take may years to master.

below is an image of one of my disciples practising the technique









note that the hand and mouse are not moving.
this state is gained by moving neither the hand or the mouse


I hope these advanced methods have helped you along your path to achieve Gamevana.

for a glossary of terms please consult this handy resource www.google.com

COMING SOON!!

Guide 3

MOVING ABOUT A BIT

please keep checking back for this exciting new guide coming soon to this section

ITS WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR.....PEW PEW PEW

[GΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃΛ]

Ahhh OZ, this is where you fail, you need to wipe the fag ash and dead hookers from the flat leg protector/keyboard stand , and pour white gloss paint all over it, you should then wait at least 3 minutes before resuming "handmouseoffy"on your new mousing surface, any excess paint will soon run onto the floor, where the rats will lick it up for you.
****WARNING****WARNING****WARNING****WARNING****WARNING****WARNING
Please refrain from looking out of the fake monitor on the large vertical desk, it contains nothing but sillyness, and simulation of such events should be avoided at all costs.

[Ouzaru]

I thought I was proficient enough in these instructions to try applying these tactics to the new release of Borderlands: Pre-Sequel (or is it Borderlands 1.5??) .... anyhow, copying your directions and replicating the illustrations as acurately as possible, I cannot get the mouse to stop falling on the floor when I perform the "handmouseoffy" technique. I maybe need to clarify that slightly more - I do not have anything that is as white as in the illustration, thus the nearest match to this colour is the wall adjacent to the big rectangular viewy thingy with moving pictures. Do you have any advice on this matter that might be applicable to the latest game in the series?

[GΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃΛ]

an unexpected bonus....no extra charge

[easy]

Instructions weren't clear enough...threw my cat out the window of my house coz I couldn't stop shooting :S

[GΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃΛ]

Please see fig.2 this provides an illustration of what has commonly become known as a hand with fingers, which are the collection of sausagey prodruvanences eminating from the so called "hand" I hope this helps

[Jon//Bl00dbath]

if I knew what a hand was I would be less apprehensive about answering that question

[GΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃΛ]

are you using the correct hand and/or mouse

[Jon//Bl00dbath]

when i remove my hand from my right mouse button I don't unzoom, help!

[Raceclimb]

dude i got 50k BAP says this is BLOODY F******N FUNNY...ty for the laugh!

[GΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃΛ]

Oh my, it seems I have arrived just in time to save the dear users of steam from a life of confusion and trapped todgers, I will meditate on this and return with help