Recent reviews by Arden_Foxx

Why graduate when i could get paid to drink soda?

I jumped off the battlements to bring flowers to a prostitute because the guards locked me on the battlements with no way out. I hobbled to the village in the dark because i broke both of my legs after jumping off the battlements and then tumbling down a hill. When i finally got to the prostitute at the bath house her boyfriend showed up and knocked me out cold whilst my best friend watched. When I came to, said friend and I got hammered even though I was about to bleed to death and many of my bones were broken. I passed out again and woke up in the yard in the morning, still very broken and near death.

If only dating in real life was this realistic.

I was only 9 years old
I loved Counter Strike: Global Offensive so much
I had all of the skins and stickers
I would pray to GabeN every night before a case opening, praying to get a good knife skin
"Counter Strike is love," i say, "Counter Strike is life"
My dad hears me and calls me a try hard
I know he must just be jealous for my devotion for Counter Strike
I call him a N00B
I'm doing a case opening know on twitch
i've gotten 13 blues in a row
I open my last case
It lands on an extremely rare item
It's a Factory New Stattrak AWP Asiimov
I am so happy
GabeN whispers in my ear, "This is my game"
He grabs me with his powerful developer hands and puts me on my hands and knees
I'm ready
I open my wallet for GabeN
He siezes it from my hands
It pains me so much, but i do it for GabeN
i can see my wallet emptying as i start to worry
I breathe in heavily
i want to please GabeN
He laughs a hearty laugh as he fills my inventory with cases
My dad walks in
GabeN looks him straight in the eye and says, "Money gets you to great places"
GabeN leaves through Mid Doors
Counter Strike is love, Counter Strike is life

Killed a dozen robots to access an area i didn't need to go to at that point. Got killed by a robot i couldn't see the moment i stepped into the new area. Insta-rage

This game is probably the best fighting game that i have in my library. I would love to see what happens to it in the future