Recent reviews by Level 52 Hat Inspector

Roommates follows the wacky adventures of a college warband under one roof. You take the roll of either Max, or Anne catering their entire semester experience to what you see fit. Max takes the roll of the rocker scumbag who couldn't give a ♥♥♥♥ about how he performs in his classes. He self indulges in psychoactive drugs to pass his down time while sleeping with his guitar. Anne is the typical bookworm nerdy type, almost never leaving her room so she can read her kawaii desu fan fiction. Upon start of the game you become indoctrinated into your first college warband in preperation for the X games.

Stare into the dark abyss known as Dominc, the supreme commander of the dorm, and all around bastard. His favorite past times include kicking dogs, MMO RPG's, and refusing to remove the stick in his anal cavity.

Soon after you meet Isabella, the not at all sexual innuendo laced character in the whole damn game. This expertly crafted character who wears very little clothing will slowly sneak right into your heart. She barely holds down her job at the campus coffee shop, because no matter what you order you'll get ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ candy.

And who could forget Sally, a devote follower to the Vegan lifestyle. Events around this character include:
Discussing the benefits of eating that one cow
Why Five Guys is a gift to all human kind
Experimenting on baby rabbits is for the betterment of mankind
Why am I still doing this

And the final boss, Rakesh. He is the right hand of darkness, and should be both feared and respected. You will be under his influence the moment you start the game. You will be convinced that every event played within the game should be catered to Rakesh. This is a noob trap. His end goals include getting you into an extremely erotic bunny suit, giving him a mayo sponge bath, and force feeding him paper. Rakesh is an evil in this game you must try to avoid at all costs

The game also includes many forgetable side characters such as Spinny Glasses guy, Roxanne the anti Anne character, kinda chubby girl who you can decide to bully if you so choose (If you do, you're kind of a ♥♥♥♥), and last but not least, Chad the hunk cake. He is the secret mini boss you must face if you decide to romance Isabella, and lets face it, you're all going to.

The core gameplay revolves around reading text while looking at still images in the background. The characters have a wide range of animation such as smiling, blushing, and opening and closing their mouth. If you're lucky you'll be treated with some amazing sound effects to go with the scenario. More gameplay mechanics include Lock Picking, Bunny Hopping, and an RPG inspired spreadsheet level up system. The game has three difficulties: Easy, Standard, and Nightmare. Upon extensive playtime, I have no idea what the difference between Easy and Normal is. Nightmare mode adds elements such as not being able to heal unless you drink a potion, and the only way to repair broken limbs is with a doctors bag, or visting a doctor.

The one major event in this game is Vladimir's gambit. You must complete some ridiculous class project with a chosen partner. You can either actually do the work, or betray your partner so you both get a guaranteed C. Vladimir will tempt you with promises of wealth and a seat of power. This is a trick, and you must give in to unlock the bonus artwork. The game will have one of two endings at this point: You and Anne will pass Vladimir's gambit, and you'll recieve the "Not Bronze Anymore" lovers ending. The other ending has you sacrificing Anne to solidify your rise to power. Rakesh will enter at this point, stating there can be only two, a master and apprentice. This nets you the "Whose Side Are You On?" achievement right as he slides the cerimonial dagger into your chest.

I would not recommend this game.

Fiddlesticks sucks Fiddledicks. Worst character in the game. 7/10 it's alright

Probably the worst strategy game of all time. You can't pronounce any of the names, and the game play is boring and terrible. This game only makes you sad and kills boners in a shameful display. Don't waste your money on this ♥♥♥♥ pile, and your mom has a job.

You are a lone Space Man launched out into space without a single ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ warning. You then find yourself trying to get back to your research station, only to soon realized you wish you exploded on the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ asteroid you landed on. You spend weeks wandering around the cold, dead station. You than find the Portal device. You soon realize you can create 4 other lonely Space Men, who will copy you down to your exact movement. This scientific feat comes at a steap cost...strange Alien rocks can now talk to you. They will send you imagines of horror, roasted burning babies, the screams of the damned and even spout out nonsense that sounds like dying whales. As you slolwy lose your sanity you meet another Human scientist: Mrrgery Stuart Baxter. She informs you that she indeed created the flying sex rocks in order to rain hell on the liberal agenda. Using your 4 ♥♥♥♥ buddys you defeat Wendy the adopted flying space ♥♥♥♥ and kiss your husband.

This game is ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hard and I ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hate it. Would never slam again.