Verdun
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Canadian rule book for being a Canadian on the battlefield.
By ColaKong
Aye Sergeant Scumbag want to be a true man of the north than you mut abide by these rules or else you will be the Jerries first human ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ and you know what type of deseases they have in their ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ from lonely nights aye.
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Be respectful to your friends and nasty to your enemies
All Canadians are born polite gentlemen except Wolverine and Deadpool so do your mates a favor and stop with those bloody class switch requests since thats one good way to be booted to the germans nearest bathroom for unpleasent penetration but not with a bullet of course. So say please, thank you, pass the maple syrup and try not to have a supiriority complex on who you think the best hockey player/team is oh and say sorry for every little thing you do.

Use your guns less often.
Now you picture this, your a dirty prostitute STD filled Jerry running around no mans land and you see the enemy trench just a few few meters away from your ♥♥♥♥♥♥ rabbit hole, so you run your little ass over there and you have successfully made it in the trench and its time to clear them all out....wait did you hear amazingly ferocious screaming and wood pounding from footsteps,your vision clears up but its too late as the source of the awesome noise swung their trench club so hard that your head popped like a waterballoon spilling your brains everywhere. So yeagh use clubs and knives as often as possible or you'll end up like that Jerry that I killed, true story btw.
Syrup and cinnamon rolls are the new mountain dew and doritos
Me:Aye mate what are you doing?
Seargent Scumbag:Eating some Doritos and drinkin some Mountain Dew. Want some?
Me: Are you crazy? What if NCO find out?
NCO:Alright numbnutsits time for health inspection,You better smells of maple syrup and to make sure I have my pet bear, Jackson sniff it out of you if you have anything else.You first Private Snow.
Jackson:*sniff* *sniff* *moan* *lick*.
NCO: Alright it's your turn Seargent Scumbag.
Scumbag:*whimper*
Jackson:*sniff* *sniff*
well I wont tell you the wole story but Sgt.Scumbag basically got his arm bitten off by Jackson and become a one armed prostitute for the Germans so please always try to smell like maple.
Now praise the free north and all the Maple syrup,cinnemon rolls and Hockey players.
15 Comments
[BR] Vicente Oct 17, 2022 @ 1:20pm 
Gay...mer
Lone Wolfe Apr 21, 2021 @ 7:52pm 
Awesome, man
CAiN Nov 19, 2020 @ 12:56pm 
100% true can confirm. excellent guide.
Bill Fielder Aug 8, 2019 @ 6:31pm 
sorry I couldn't follow the steps properly eh. my Ross Rifle MK3 blew up in my hands.:cozycastondeath:
Silas Greaves Feb 18, 2018 @ 9:27am 
I feel inspired by this !
jgDarkWolf Feb 12, 2018 @ 9:58am 
What a great guide for canadian peoplekind
acur1231 Nov 26, 2017 @ 9:56pm 
This is great. Finally my 20% melee kills is vindicated.
Gleen Jan 9, 2017 @ 10:35pm 
ok good cause belive it or not ive met people who actully think that stuff so have a good day
EH gotta go feed the cariboo and get drunk off maple syrup cya
ColaKong  [author] Jan 9, 2017 @ 10:13pm 
Gleen, no one thinks that steriotypes define a group of people or even a country unless they are too incompetant to see others as free thinking indivisuals. This isn't supposed to be a serious guide on how you should perceive Canadians and Germans on the battlefield of WW1 and is supposed to be humorous in the fact that in real life, this isn't at all how people thought or acted.
Gleen Jan 9, 2017 @ 11:50am 
i think this is funny but i think you shoudlnt be so disrespectful for the soliders that fought pay your respects i do thionk this is funny i just hope you dont actully think this way