How to Jetstream Sam

Jetstream Sam is really cool. Here's how to become him, and eventually kill god Himself.

Becoming Jetstream Sam

Basically uhhh go onto amazon and spend $181 on a Murasama Replica.
Go to the supermarket, get a bunch of tinfoil and Plate your body with it, like armor.

Congratulations, You have Become Jetstream Sam, as long as you can swing that sword, it is that simple.

Pre-God Fight vs. Armstrong

Before your path to fighting god you have to climb the World Marshall Building, kick the ♥♥♥♥ out of a Metal Gear, which should be relatively easy, and then armstrong, who if you beat, will subsiquently impale your arm to the floor.

fear not though, if he does, out of the kindness of his heart, he will give you a sick ass robot arm.

To beat armstrong, time your slices right to hit him in spots not protected by his nanomachines

Killing God

This part is Essentially to the speedrun, but will be harder. If you don't care about speedrunning, take this part slow.

Basically, you will need to go to the nearest church and climb through the skylight. If its covered in stained glass you have to break through.
After you do that you should be in heaven, this is the hard part, Finding him, it will be difficult because as we all know, God is scared of Brazilians, because they can double Jump. He'll probably be hiding somewhere where you don't expect it.
Once you find him he'll engage in his mech suit, Take it down and beat him, and finally

You have become Jetstream Sam.

End

Uhhhh good job, now you can go settle down and have a wife and children, knowing that you're Jetstream Sam. Enjoy

[Hitmonchan]

i'm sorry

[Adventurer Retro]

Sam is not better than Jesus. Definitely not. Ask God for forgiveness.

[ghostbagel13]

Instructions unclear, Blade wolf is now my pet

[Mailpup addict]

Instructions unclear, I shat myself

[Horus Angelos]

instructions unclear, i managed to wipe out senator armstrong using only parries

[Hitmonchan]

true....

[Gay Rat]

ok but what if i name the character Jetstream Sam or Samuel Rodriguez and then go to the right side of hell untill i find the draedons lab and get his sword Murasama before killing any bosses like desert scourge or eye of cthulu

[strawby7]

wait real?

[Enclave gaming]

Instructions unclear, I accidentally destroyed the universe while fighting God and now I have to restart the universe beginning to end

[Hitmonchan]

omg real sam no way