[MAJOR WIP] Answers to Your Questions (Probably Literally)

!! Please proceed with caution as this is a SPOILER RIDDEN guide. !!

This is a quick rundown of how the game works (to my knowledge) and how to make things work out for you in the end.

This is a constant WIP and may never be "fully" finished. If you see parts missing though, feel free to ask, if you don't see an answer to your question as to why it's missing in the FAQ at the bottom.

Getting Started: A Disclaimer

If you didn't read the description, here's your second warning.

This guide is spoiler ridden. The spoilers? They're rampant.
It's also unfinished and will continue to be updated as I play through.
If you have additions you'd like to contribute (I'll credit you, of course), please feel free to ask to add me and then IM me these contributions.
Please do not post them in the comments section. I want to keep it clear for questions for the FAQ.

Thanks!

- XII/Tyzias

2/272019
"This guide, clearly, hasn't been updated in a long time. I don't know if or when I'll pick it back up, but there have been many new guides since the creation of this one. Best of luck to you; I hope what information is here is helpful to you later on in your runs."

Getting Started II: Magazine Hell 101

The Base Explanation

So, you want to know what the magazine is for, eh?

It's fairly simple:
The magazine determines what stats get a bit of a boost, which will help later with your choices with people.

"What do you mean stats?"
There are six basic stats in the game: Smarts, Boldness, Creativity, Charm, Fun, and Money (Wealth). The magazine at the start of the game will boost your stats depending on what answers you pick (and I think they may decrease as well? 5 seems to be the standard but who knows, so don't take the decrease literally). This section is a maaaaajor WIP as we try to find all the questions, answers, and relating boosts. As I (XII) try to play full games when I play, this section may take some time to update. If you have information you'd like to share, please see "Getting Started: A Disclaimer" on how to do so accordingly!

"But what about the third question?"
That question gives you an extra heart with... whoever it applies to. I (XII) am not entirely sure how that works just yet and I'll update this proper when I do.

The Magazine: Stat Questions

This is where questions (and answers with the according boosts) will be posted. Please note that there are only three answers (randomly generated) and so, this is (likely) unfinished! I (XII) am a solo player, so most of this work is done alone, unless someone elects to help (in which they will be noted in the notes at the end of each corresponding section).

Democracy is just broken. What would be the coolest way of choosing the leaders of modern society?
+ Creativity: Whoever can play the most heartbreaking violin solo wins.
+ Fun: We create a reality show called "America's Next Top President" where the candidates compete in all kinds of physical and mental challenges. Voter turnout would increase and we would turn a profit on it!
+ Boldness: You put all the candidates in an empty room... With a wild grizzly bear. Whoever kills the bear should be our president. If everyone dies, then it's obvious: The bear should be our next president.

You wish you were raised by...
+ Boldness: A really progressive marriage between a kick-ass venomous snake and... Actual fire. I love fire and see no issue with being raised by it.
+ Money/Wealth: A pack of wild wolves... who also happen to be tech moguls who own some of the most profiable companies of Silicon Valley. They would be some kick-ass role models AND wild wolves! Sick!
+ Fun: A mysterious old man who saved me from the streets in order to raise me as his disciple in the ancient ways of rad DJing!

If you had to have sex with an animal... which animal would it be?
+ Smarts: A human being, because I'm the kind of douchebag who loves to find loopholes in stupid questions like this one.
+ Charm: A great white shark. If I have to ♥♥♥♥ an animal, let's at least make it a story worth telling!
+ Creativity: A swan. They're classy. Plus it reminds me of that myth of Leda and the Swan, so at least by beastiality (it says bestiality--) standards, it has a certain chic appeal.
+ Boldness: No one can make me ♥♥♥♥ an animal. If I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ an animal, it'd be of my own free will. As a matter of fact, I already have ♥♥♥♥♥♥ an animal, so the joke's on you, pal.
+ Fun: A dolphin. They're the only other animal that ♥♥♥♥♥ just for pleasure, so at least we can both do our best to have a good time, right?
+ Money/Wealth: A purebred horse. At least I can keep his semen and sell it. It's worth a lot! Who said there was no silver lining to beastiality?

School is outdated and lame. We need a new school subject ASAP!
+ Charm: Turning People Into Your Puppets Through Emotional Warfare and Deception 101.
+ Boldness: How to Correctly Punch a Crocodile Without Terrible Consequences.
+ Smarts: Critical Thought. I mean... Damn, this country could really use a subject like that in schools.

You get the chance to produce a movie. It's based on...
+ Fun: The most influential Russian novelists of the XIX century... have gone nuts! They don't remember anything about last night and now they can't find the manscript of the Brothers Karamazov; and Dostoyevsky has to deliver it TODAY!
+ Money/Wealth: Something about superheroes, but with a love triangle between a beautiful yet somewhat relatable girl (maybe she's akways stating she's a mess?) and two of the super hot superheroes, which are also like vamptires or pirates or both. Instant hit!
+ Boldness: Two cool guys walking away from rad explosions. And they don't look at the explosions. THEY DON'T GIVE A ♥♥♥♥ ABOUT THE EXPLOSIONS! They refelct on life and love... BUT IT IS SUPER DOPE AND KICK-ASS BECAUSE THEY DO SO WALKING AWAY FROM THE NEVER-ENDING EXPLOSIONS!

If you could put a curse on your worst enemy, what would it do?
+ Boldness: I'd curse them to fall in love with a wonderufl person and be happily married for years before they realize that all this time... Their partner was a wild panther in disguise! Then the panther viciously devours my enemy. Classic!
+ Smarts: You can't rely on the effectiveness of a curse. I prefer to take care of my enemies the old-fashioned way: By exposing them to unsafe doses of radiation over the course of several years.
+ Charms: The curse of always meeting obnoxious people at parties who are super into new fad diets that feel the need to explain them in detail.

The coolest reality show would be...
+ Money/Wealth: Eight rich people fight in weekly challenges to see who's the best at giving money to you.
+ Charm: Twelve experts on the various arts of seduction live in a house where they must face a common challenge: seducing a potato into marriage... Somewhow.
+ Smarts: People in positions of power must face all sorts of questions relevant to their field, and if they fail, they lost their jobs... And society wins.

The Magazine: Date Questions

I think this is self-explanatory.

You find a genie in a bottle. You can ask for whatever you want. What do you ask for?
+ Liam: ... Hime to not be so cliched. Genie and wishes... So mainstream!
+ Polly: Infinite contetti!
+ Miranda: A rainbow that you can eat!
+ Scott: ... His friendship!
+ Vera: Before asking for anything, you try to negotiate up to the three standard wishes.
+ Damien: I don't ask for anything. I drink the genie from the bottle. I can grant my own wishes!

What would be the most appealing in a love partner?
+ Liam: Sharp wits.
+ Polly: A taste for party.
+ Miranda: Kawaii eyes.
+ Scott: Soft fur.
+ Vera: A very tsundere personality.
+ Damien: A big... horn.

What's the sexiest type of knowledge a lover can have?
+ Liam: Obscure 80s movie trivia.
+ Polly: How to make a killer cocktail out of anything.
+ Miranda: Lyrics to all Disney songs.
+ Scott: Sports things.
+ Vera: All the principles to build a financial empire.
+ Damien: How to set stuff on fire.

What criteria would you use to name your children?
+ Liam: A non-heteronormative name to give them freedom to define themselves on their own terms.
+ Polly: Meh... No name? It's just too much work!
+ Miranda: My name + "II" (the Second).
+ Scott: Something simple and friendly like Bobby or Mary.
+ Vera: I will research for a name that is pun-proof and joke-proof. No one will pick on them.
+ Damien: Just a swear word.

What would be a killer accessory?
+ Liam: Coolness itself.
+ Polly: Sunglasses... At night.
+ Miranda: Shiny armor.
+ Scott: A necklace with your own name... In case you forget!
+ Vera: A fabulous purse made from the skin of your worst enemy.
+ Damien: Fancy brass knuckles.

The Beginning: Take Some Notes

A fairly short section. All you need to know is: What stats do you want to boost?

Smarts? Go to class, nerd.
Boldness? The bathrooms seem to be the place to hang.
Creativity? Boo, get out of here you musical wannabe. The auditorium is to the left.
Charm? Gym is where everyone wears their short shorts. Get into yours!
Fun? My kind of guy! The great outdoors is the best place for raves. Almost.
Money/Weath? The best way to do it is through the internet. How to get to the internet? To the library!

As for wooing? Don't worry about what the character would want. Go with the best responses!
Your stats will help you with this. Keep this in mind! They like responses that fit your stats, so it seems.

Also note that all the dialogue options that can happen don't have to be in a specific place (as far as I'm aware for non-item related interactions). Please continue on!

Wooing: Liam

A current WIP by XII. Will be updated as I play through because I will get him to take me to prom if it's the last thing I do.

Lunch Interactions

Liam & Miranda - Miranda Learns To Eat
+ Miranda: Maybe you should start this madness, Liam. Imagine all the food you could Instagram, without having to eat any of it!
+ Liam: But Miranda, look at the contented smile on that servant's face! You think he's eating for you, but secretly, he's eating for himself!

Liam & Polly - No Need For Food? Photos!
+ Polly: A food pic, but instead of food, it's just a bottle of whiskey with ketchup on it.
+ Liam: A food pic of Liam taking a food pic! So meta!

Liam & Vera - Animal Diets
+ Vera: The animals you kill may lose their lives... but what about their afterlives? Instead of letting their spirits go to waste as the byproduct of the meat industry, let's serve their eternal souls as a side dish!
+ Liam: Liam, animals are already suffering... from ignorance! If Vera wanted to increase their pain... the best we can do is to teach them the concept of death so they really fear their fate! Let's educate cattle on metaphysics.

Liam & Scott - Food Pic Cheersquad
+ Scott: We've gotta pick Liam up and toss him in the air. It's the only way to really amp him up.
+ Liam: Liam's food pics are art, so we've got to use are to cheer him on. The quiet art of mime!

Liam & Vera - Wine Tasting
+ Liam: Try the sangria. It pairs well with seafood... and blood.
+ Vera: The tannens in this robust malbec are an elegant way to mask the taste of poison. Perfect for "diplomatic" missions.

Liam & Polly - They Have A "Food Disorder"
+ Polly: Dump all of Polly's food onto Liam's plate.
+ Liam: Dump all of Liam's food onto Polly's plate.

Basic Interactions

Liam & Miranda - A Bathroom-Related Art Piece (Provide a definition of art)
Smartness (+ Miranda): Art is a method for making worthless things into very expensive things.
Creativity(?) (+ Liam): Art isn't art unless it makes you feel bad things inside.

Liam & Miranda - Everything Is Beautiful Secret Club
Charm (?) (+ Miranda): You're in luck! I just happen to have the membership paperwork right here. Magic is real!
Smarts (+ Liam): Oh, it's super easy to join. All you have to do is eat a bunch of cotton candy and crap out a unicorn. Simpleton.

Liam - Boycotting Is Too Obvious
UNKNOWN (Theory: Smarts/Boldness/Charm): Thirteen minutes of judgemental staring.
Creativity: A live mashup of Stravinsky's "Rite of Spring" and the theme song from the Ninja Turtles.

Liam, Damien, Polly, & Miranda - Paleo Diet Celebrities and Pixie Hairstyles
Money/Wealth: Divert their attention by making money rain.
Smarts: Turn Damien's phone into a bird.

Liam - Theatre Critic
UNKNOWN (Theory: Creativity/Smarts): The audience is the villan. Destroy them from the stage, hack their social media, import the fires of hell. As they choke on brimstone and spam, they'll realize that they were the monster all along.
Boldness: People like ♥♥♥♥. Real costumes? Cardboard boxes. Professional actors? Giggling cheerleaders. Give Scott the leading role. Subsitute the orchestra with dubstep and make it a musical.

Liam & Damien - Naruto & Hair Styling
UNKNOWN (Theory: Boldness/Creativity): Witness a loved one getting killed, or almost killed, and get so angry you end up unleashing a new level of stylism.
Charm: Meet a tough adversary and build a rivalrous frenemy relationship that pushes the both of you to improve.

Liam & Slayer - Holy Bolts
UNKNOWN (Theory: Boldness/Fun): A hotdog stand.
Creative: A general feeling of unease.

Liam, Polly, & Miranda - Intermission Performance
Creative: Re-enact Snow White! Miranda can be Snow White, Liam can be the prince, and Polly can be every single other character!
UNKNOWN (Theory: Money/Wealth): Literally just throw money at them. People love money.

Liam - Startkicker
UNKNOWN (Theory: Creativity/Fun): 3.85 billion BC, so you can be into existing before it was cool.
Smarts: Everyone know(s*) the dopest time in monster history was 1925... Specifically July 26th, 2 AM to 5 AM.

Liam - Totally Not A Date
UNKNOWN (Theory: Boldness/Fun): It's not a date, it's a "date". WINK.
Creative: It's performance art. Liam forgot to tell you we'll be wearing duck costumes the whole time.

Liam, Miranda, Polly, & Damien - Career Problems
UNKNOWN (Theory: Smarts/Creativity): Practice the art of stealth makeover! Give your dads a complete makeover while they sleep for them to naturally discover the advantages of your dream.
Boldness: Speak a language they understand: Change your scissors for a dagger and your makeup for blood.

Notes

After numerous attempts, I finally got Liam to go to Prom with me. My stats totalled at:
Smarts 23 | Boldness 4 | Creativity 21 | Charm 18 | Fun 10 | Weath 0
After going straight Smarts/Charm, I can definitely say you need some creativity. How much is unknown.
Some edits have been made from help from Dodo-Y-ME368. Thank you so much!

Wooing: Polly

Not a current focus.

Wooing: Miranda

Not a current focus.

Wooing: Scott

Not a current focus.

Wooing: Vera

Not a current focus.

Wooing: Damien

Not a current focus.

Alternative Luncheons

These are the questions and answers for the lunches with the other non-datable (?) characters in the game!

Please note that this list is also noted to currently be incomplete by its contributor(s).

Coven

Spell Practice
+ Smarts: The future, the past and the present.
+ Creativity: Two helicopters.

Adventure of choice?
+ Creativity: Stop the crime ghost.
+ Money/Wealth: Income inequality.

Genie Wish
+ Money/Wealth: A bag of quarters.
+ Fun: A machine that can successfully reheat french fries.

Coach

Food Workout
+ Fun: Playing with your food. Specifically, playing football with your food.
+ Boldness: An absolutely ridiculous number of push-ups.

Supplements..?
+ Charm: Horse supplement.
+ Fun: Party time.

No Milk. Only JUICE.
+ Boldness: Both.
+ Fun: Whiskey.

Werewolf Pack

Food Trade
+ Fun: How about this black plastic bottle labeled "SERIOUSLY DON'T DRINK THIS IT'S POISON."
+ Boldness: Nothing. Give me my beef jerky back. Now.

Breathing Lessons
+ Smarts: Teach me calculus.
+ Charm: Give me an extreme makeover!

Werewolf activity..?
+ Charm: Howling at the moon.
+ Creativity: Ikebana.

Interdimentional Prince

TV Problems
+ Creativity: Our own ritual.
+ Money/Wealth: A pile of money.

Pickle Seal
+ Charn: Foreign Minister in Charge of Extreme Handsomeness.
+ Money/Wealth: Most Unscrupulous Treasurer.

It's A Ringtone
+ Smarts: Telepathy.
+ Charm: An ass that won't quit.

Slayer

Emotional Questline
+ Fun: Partysmith.
+ Boldness: Gun-haver.

Knee-Punching Apple Loot
+ Fun: Garlic, rice, and holy water. One monster's weakness is another monster's dinner!
+ Boldness: A gun that shoots stakes with "EAT ♥♥♥♥" burned into the side of them.

Notes

This list was provided by Dodo-Y-ME368 (and further edited to fit formatting as well as added to by XII). Thank you so much!

Secret Ending Tips

This was solely created out of spite. I (XII) was working on the guide/achievements and continued to almost constantly unlock secret endings (or triggered them) without intending to. So, here's some tips and tricks for secret endings as I stumble on them.

Prom King Liam
- Just farm Money and take use all the mone options Miranda throws at you when she wants to try to increase Liam's popularity then go to prom with him. Easy. (lazy3hypocrite has also kindly pointed out that high creativity is an option for this as well.)

Yaoi Artist Liam
- so I finally got this ending and it was pure charm for it. I'm not 100% sure how to trigger it though (past the initial confrontation from Damien about the art), but I think trying for Liam is the most optimal when trying to trigger it? I've also triggered it while trying to date Damien though, so who knows.

Prom Fight w/ Damien
- Boldness is key here. Farm up your boldness (potentially another stat, fun, maybe??) until he confronts you (rather angrily) and tells you to move (don't move, dance). Once you do that, you should trigger an event where he's fussing at a banana. Eat it. Then go to prom with him.

Hairstylist Damien
- WIP. (I know this is a thing, for sure, but I haven't done the event fully yet and have only ever triggered it once.)

Reverse Something-Or-Other with Polly
- I straight up can't remember the name of this but I think you need a good bit of Charm and/or Fun with some Boldness to trigger this? Don't quote me on it. She'll ask you about it. Bounce (I used a smoke bomb). Buy the penguin mask. Current WIP as I don't know the rest.

Notes

lazy3hypocrite

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: I posted a question in the comments, but now my comment is gone!
A: Then scroll down further, if you didn't get an add from one of the contributors listed in the next section.

Q: I posted a contribution in the comments, but now it's gone!
A: That it is. Please see "Getting Started: A Disclaimer".

Q: How do I help contribute to this guide?
A: Contact XII (author). Please comment that you're going to send a friend request or I will ignore you.

Q: Why didn't you post my contribution? (Or: I posted it before the person you listed for it!)
A: Chances are that I (XII) already had the answer or the credited person contacted me before you.

Q: Are you looking for specific people to help with the character routes?
A: Possibly. This is an idea I'm currently tossing around. Please contact me via Steam for my Discord, as I'd prefer a group chat for something like this.

Q: Do you know what stat numbers we need to do X?
A: I don't, but this guide is pretty helpful!

Q: Updates have stopped! Why?
A: After my internet came back from a one-month hiatus, I lost interest in this game hardcore. Replaying routes drained my interest, but I didn't want to hop around between routes either without finishing the one I was on. :( Because of this, work has come to a standstill. I may start working on this again at a later date, but until then, this guide is done.

More to be added as seen necessary.

Contributors

Myself, XII, the author (Getting Started I & II, Wooing: Liam-- Anywhere where someone isn't credited in the notes, really).
Dodo-Y-ME368 (Alternative Luncheons, Corrections/Additions with Wooing: Liam).
lazy3hypocrite (Added a small note to Prom King Liam.)

[rawrku]

May I add you? I have a few outcomes that aren't in here

[TheftyPlays]

UNKNOWN (Theory: Smarts/Creativity): Practice the art of stealth makeover! Give your dads a complete makeover while they sleep for them to naturally discover the advantages of your dream.

Stats 14 creativity
8 smarts
And 13 bold -
Second choice proved that the first relies on smarts, unless its just a skill check.

[It's Hedge]

For Vera's secret Blood Ritual ending:

She wants smarts, charm and money. Smash the library button until she brings up the Blood Ritual, and use the power of the internet instead of the Coven. After that, you need BLOOD, a GOAT, and EARRINGS. Blood can be obtained by buying the gross tampon from the shop; the Goat is obtained by going to the washrooms with high Vera stats and heart points (the goat is for school), and the earrings will just sort of appear at the last possible "school event: (i.e. not a lunch). I advise tricking the Coven into thinking you're secretly heroes, but that'll take at least 6 or 7 creativity; with the right events you might be able to get those for free, like I did.

Boom, blood ending, Vera booty, 1/22 down. All it took was a guide and TONS OF RNG.

[Spektral Teknician]

Not a problem.

As a note for the future, to everyone:

My internet connection at the house is offline and I do not know if/when it will be back. I'll try to update this when I can, since I'm hopping on various hotspots from my family, but there's no promises as to if/when I can start updating this reliably again. I'm so sorry for this. Hopefully y'all understand.

[Tentakeltier🦑]

I wish we had this info about what stats is needed in-game for the choices we have already chosen (and basically KNOW already but just can't remember for sure, haha). Thanks for this! :)