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I was greeted with an absolute BEAR of a man, I'm talking 450 pounds of pure Dorito crumb and chicken tendie infused hair covered man beast.
At first I was a bit disappointed but I thought you only live once (YOLO as the cool kids say) and I nervously accepted his offer to hang for a while.
We sat on the couch and after 5 minutes he was on top of me, I could barely breathe with his full weight crushing my fragile frame but in a way it felt comforting knowing that at any minute this BEAR could smother me to death.
So after what seemed like an absolute eternity of ferocious love making from his fully erect 2 inches of pure punishment I finally came up for some air and in that moment I knew, he was the one.