Santa Claus can see you while you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake, additionally he keeps tracks on whether you've been bad or good and insists you be good for "goodness" sake.

Taking all these factors into account, I feel I can confidently say Santa Claus is a fed.

So he was having problems with his laptop computer and asked me to look at it. I of course agreed since he's my grandpa. Well I opened it up and logged in but I guess he doesn't know about clearing his browser history or incognito mode because he watches a TON of hentai. As in that's the vast majority of his web browsing.

Well I saw what he was talking about and what his problem was. His hard drive was full. Full of hentai. Now I have to talk to my grandfather about his porn habits and exolain that he's going to have to delete some of these videos now. Today is not going great.

Society needs to allow people to scratch their ass in public. Theres not a single soul in the world who doesnt hate having an itchy anus and not being able to do much about it.

♥♥♥♥ you. I WILL scratch my anus in public.

If you ♥♥♥♥ in the sink at exactly 4:20 am and yell “amogus” 69 times, a shadowy figured called mom will come to beat you up and you will wake up in a place called the orphanage

Слава сиськам!

♥♥♥♥♥♥ тебе на постном масле!