Bloodreaver's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:11am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 8:42am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:24am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:23am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:24am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 12:57pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 12:49pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2017 @ 12:18pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 4:12pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 5:29pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked Aug 10, 2021 @ 7:14pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2017 @ 12:18pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:08pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 6:53pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:35pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:51pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 1:22pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2017 @ 11:47am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 12:27pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:11pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 2:10pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 9:06am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 12:27pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 12:20pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 5:12pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2017 @ 11:49am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:47pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 9:24am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 9:20am

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 12:21pm

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:08pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:19am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 4:14pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 8:43am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 12:58pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked Sep 28, 2018 @ 11:08am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:02am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 9:01am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 7:22am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 1:05pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 1:11pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:10pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2017 @ 11:37am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 8:57am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 1:03pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 12:45pm

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 5:04pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 1:20pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked Jun 26, 2017 @ 1:10pm

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2017 @ 4:35pm

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:10pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked Jul 28, 2021 @ 9:53pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked Jul 31, 2021 @ 12:55am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked Aug 1, 2021 @ 1:37am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked Aug 3, 2021 @ 6:18pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked Aug 15, 2021 @ 2:50pm

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.

Unlocked Jul 27, 2021 @ 7:11pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked Jul 31, 2021 @ 3:03am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked Aug 1, 2021 @ 2:11am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked Jul 31, 2021 @ 12:52am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked Jul 3, 2017 @ 7:04pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked Jun 27, 2017 @ 12:33pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

24 / 30

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

13 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

13 / 30