Wompnomp's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2014 @ 7:05pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked Jun 30, 2014 @ 3:46pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2014 @ 7:05pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 10:56am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked Jun 30, 2014 @ 3:39pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked Jun 30, 2014 @ 3:58pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked Jul 16, 2014 @ 3:40pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 10:48am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 12:03pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 1:11pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 2:34pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked Aug 26, 2014 @ 2:41pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2014 @ 4:40pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 1:01pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 6:31pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 1:57pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 5:40pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked Aug 24, 2014 @ 9:10pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked Jul 2, 2014 @ 12:49pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 12:36pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked Jun 30, 2014 @ 3:42pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 10:37am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked Aug 24, 2014 @ 9:12pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 12:11pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 2:40pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked Apr 9, 2017 @ 8:32am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked Jul 16, 2014 @ 3:22pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 12:03pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2014 @ 7:03pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked Aug 24, 2014 @ 9:18pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 2:09pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2014 @ 12:12pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked Jul 16, 2014 @ 2:55pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked Jun 28, 2014 @ 7:02pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked Jul 16, 2014 @ 2:58pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2014 @ 12:14pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked Jul 2, 2014 @ 12:50pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 11:04am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 1:05pm

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2014 @ 12:12pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked Aug 25, 2014 @ 12:58pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked May 14 @ 12:03pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked Aug 26, 2014 @ 2:43pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

3 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

11 / 30

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

7 / 30

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

19 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30