Mleko1792two's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 6:58am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 4:22am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 7:49am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 6:58am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 11:00am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked Apr 28, 2021 @ 6:54am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 3:58am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 5:01am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 9:34am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 3:09pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 12:12pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 1:32pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked Aug 24, 2017 @ 11:06am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 2:00pm

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 9:29am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 10:33am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked Aug 21, 2017 @ 7:47am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 11:48am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 7:30am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 8:47am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 5:26am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 6:12am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 1:37pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 5:54am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 4:20am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 12:03pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 1:36pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked Apr 27, 2021 @ 10:46am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 2:50pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked Apr 27, 2021 @ 3:56am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 1:38pm

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked Apr 29, 2021 @ 5:37am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked Aug 21, 2017 @ 7:35am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 3:00pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 3:01pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 9:04am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 1:07pm

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 9:12am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked Apr 27, 2021 @ 3:52am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked Apr 27, 2021 @ 11:38am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 7:35am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 4:03am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 11:38am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 3:11am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 3:03pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 2:14pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 5:22am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked Aug 19, 2017 @ 8:02am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 9:49am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 9:37am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked Apr 27, 2021 @ 11:01am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 11:13am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 4:57am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 3:49am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.

Unlocked Aug 22, 2017 @ 11:44am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 10:10am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked Aug 20, 2017 @ 9:38am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked Apr 28, 2021 @ 1:52am

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked Aug 21, 2017 @ 7:58am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 10:18am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked Aug 24, 2017 @ 11:07am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked Apr 29, 2021 @ 12:36pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.

Unlocked Apr 29, 2021 @ 11:47am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked Apr 26, 2021 @ 5:59am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked Aug 18, 2017 @ 4:10am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

5 / 30

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

20 / 30

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30