Grifter_45's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 9:48am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 2:04pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked May 23, 2016 @ 7:49pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked Oct 6, 2016 @ 8:53pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 10:28am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 11:22am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 2:42pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked May 25, 2016 @ 2:05pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked Oct 5, 2016 @ 8:39pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked Oct 7, 2016 @ 7:37pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:30pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:20pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:51pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked Oct 6, 2016 @ 8:43pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 2:02pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked Oct 20, 2016 @ 7:51pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:55pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 10:36pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 9:37pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked Oct 5, 2016 @ 7:54pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked Oct 5, 2016 @ 8:04pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Jul 8, 2016 @ 9:30am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:40pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 10:16am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2016 @ 8:45pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked Oct 5, 2016 @ 8:12pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2016 @ 8:45pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:07pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 6:56pm

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked Jul 8, 2016 @ 9:42am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 10:09pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 10:30am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 11:25am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked Dec 1, 2017 @ 8:34pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 9:59am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 1:50pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked May 15, 2016 @ 9:47am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 10:17pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked May 27, 2016 @ 7:50am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked Jul 6, 2016 @ 8:45pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked Oct 21, 2016 @ 7:24pm

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 9:29pm

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 10:25pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked Oct 18, 2017 @ 10:27pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

16 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

25 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

24 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

9 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30