i force myself to sleep
it's useless
hopelessness burns my throat
the thin damp sheets
feel so heavy

i lost the value of this life
wishing to never wake again
into this painful nothingness
where promises rot
colors fade and flowers wilt

my body aches
i am so tired of the thoughts and whispers
that pollute my tears

an inescapable emptiness
if only i could persevere
to be more than a dimly lit memory
lost in stillness

the days are my sighs
this bed my solacе

i can't even begin to rеcall
the number of times
i wish i wasn't awake...