I'm straight but.

Man, I just wish I had a gay friend. We could chat, relax, kiss, have sex, engage in a casual no strings attached relationship, eventually develop emotional bonds, start to date like normal people, watch all the corny movies, eventually we'll get a dog and a cat, I'll propose, small spring wedding (because we don't want to make a fuss), buy a nice house by the National Park, adopt two children, send them to a nice school, one learns violin, the other learns the drums.

We go to the lake for the holidays every single year, eventually the older of the two children begins to lose interest in our yearly trips to the lake, asks to not go one year, I refuse but my husband changes my mind, teenager gets drunk at a friends party, the rest of the family returns from holiday and sees teenager drunk and crying, does inspirational parenting speech with countless examples of me making horrible mistakes, hugs.

Both children graduate Highschool, one studies music (violin), the other studies business, husband and I retire, we both move to a small cottage with a large back yard, take up gardening as a hobby, I feint one day and collapse in the garden, goes to emergency room, diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, two months to live, every day husband visits, we watch all the corny movies together, we go on a final trip to the lake, return to the hospice nearing the end, I lay down holding my husbands hand, final breath leaves my body with love on my mind, love for you.