The Little Man
kissin the homies goodnight
 
 
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ED IS THE STANDARD TEXT EDITOR
When I log into my Xenix system with my 110 baud teletype, both vi and Emacs are just too damn slow. They print useless messages like, ‘C-h for help’ and ‘“foo” File is read only’. So I use the editor that doesn't waste my VALUABLE time.

Ed, man! !man ed

ED(1) Unix Programmer's Manual ED(1)

NAME
ed - text editor

SYNOPSIS
ed [] [] []
DESCRIPTION
Ed is the standard text editor.

Computer Scientists love ed, not just because it comes first alphabetically, but because it's the standard. Everyone else loves ed because it's ED!

“Ed is the standard text editor.”

And ed doesn't waste space on my Timex Sinclair. Just look:

-rwxr-xr-x 1 root 24 Oct 29 1929 /bin/ed
-rwxr-xr-t 4 root 1310720 Jan 1 1970 /usr/ucb/vi
-rwxr-xr-x 1 root 5.89824e37 Oct 22 1990 /usr/bin/emacs
Of course, on the system I administrate, vi is symlinked to ed. Emacs has been replaced by a shell script which 1) Generates a syslog message at level LOG_EMERG; 2) reduces the user's disk quota by 100K; and 3) RUNS ED!!!!!!

“Ed is the standard text editor.”

Let's look at a typical novice's session with the mighty ed:

golem$ ed

?
help
?
?
?
quit
?
exit
?
bye
?
hello?
?
eat flaming death
?
^C
?
^C
?
^D
?

Note the consistent user interface and error reportage. Ed is generous enough to flag errors, yet prudent enough not to overwhelm the novice with verbosity.

“Ed is the standard text editor.”

Ed, the greatest WYGIWYG editor of all.

ED IS THE TRUE PATH TO NIRVANA! ED HAS BEEN THE CHOICE OF EDUCATED AND IGNORANT ALIKE FOR CENTURIES! ED WILL NOT CORRUPT YOUR PRECIOUS BODILY FLUIDS!! ED IS THE STANDARD TEXT EDITOR! ED MAKES THE SUN SHINE AND THE BIRDS SING AND THE GRASS GREEN!!

When I use an editor, I don't want eight extra KILOBYTES of worthless help screens and cursor positioning code! I just want an EDitor!! Not a “viitor”. Not a “emacsitor”. Those aren't even WORDS!!!! ED! ED! ED IS THE STANDARD!!!

TEXT EDITOR.

When IBM, in its ever-present omnipotence, needed to base their “edlin” on a Unix standard, did they mimic vi? No. Emacs? Surely you jest. They chose the most karmic editor of all. The standard.

Ed is for those who can remember what they are working on. If you are an idiot, you should use Emacs. If you are an Emacs, you should not be vi. If you use ED, you are on THE PATH TO REDEMPTION. THE SO-CALLED “VISUAL” EDITORS HAVE BEEN PLACED HERE BY ED TO TEMPT THE FAITHLESS. DO NOT GIVE IN!!! THE MIGHTY ED HAS SPOKEN!!!

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Kale Jul 17, 2020 @ 5:59pm 
⢾⣾⣷⣾⣽⣻⣿⣇⣿⣿⣧⣿⢸⣿⣿⡆⢸⣹⣿⣆⢥⢛⡿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⡓⣉⠉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣟⣻⠿⣹⡏⣿⣿⣧⢸⣧⣿⣿⣨⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣷⣹⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣯⣳⣿⣭⣽⢼⣿⣜⣿⣇⣷⡹⣿⣿⣿⠁
⢻⣷⣿⡄⢈⠿⠇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠲⢯⣿⣒⡾⣼⣷⡹⣿⣿⠄
⢸⣿⣿⣷⣬⣽⣯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⢀⠉⠙⠛⠛⠳⠽⠿⢠
⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢄⣹⡿⠃⠄⠄⣰⠎⡈⣾
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣭⣽⣖⣄⣴⣯⣾⢷⣿
⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠯⠊⠙⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣾⣿
⣦⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢀⣴⢾⣼⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣇⢽⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣛⣻⠿⣟⣼⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡎⣷⣽⠻⣇⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⣵⣿⣟⣽⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢯⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟
⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⢮⣚⡛⠒⠛⢛⣋⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣱⠿⣿⣿⠟⣡
No daddy pwease
Kale Jun 20, 2018 @ 3:23am 
Ok, this is ABSOLUTE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my ♥♥♥♥ to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that ♥♥♥♥♥ to shut the ♥♥♥♥ up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie.
divorced and drunk Jun 17, 2017 @ 6:50am 
On this day, our people, our very way of life are at risk. These foolish weaboo invaders have forsaken their culture, all in the pursuit of virtual anime girlfriends and body pillows with scantily-clad animated women printed upon them. On this day we stand on the brink of collapse. If we do not act upon this plague sweeping across our land, we will have nothing left. If you stand by while this most hated enemy pillages our lands and defiles our culture, we will fall. We are all that stands between greatness and the end of all. Stand up to the invaders! Do it for yourselves! Do it for your husbands and wives! Do it for your children! Do it for your children's children! Do it for the future! Do it for a greater world! If we stand together against this menace, we can achieve greatness. We can save this world from itself! We will not go silently into the night. We will fight, and we will win, until the Weaboos are gone. Until our world is pure!
The Little Man Jul 30, 2015 @ 7:10pm 
I miss u2 bby<3 sarry bonero
Kale Jul 29, 2015 @ 9:22am 
We miss u bb <3
EYEBALL_SAUCE May 20, 2015 @ 12:27am 
GHEY