Recent reviews by Alucarp

I keep convincing myself to give this game another chance but it's not worth it. Frustratingly stiff controls, boring stages that frequently force gimmicks, and a story that isn't memorable whatsoever besides the green chick being hot. The music and animation quality are great but that doesn't redeem the entire package like its defenders like to claim.

I wish I could recommend this because the world desperately needs more sexy shooters but this is not the type.

Editing this review to update a few things:
1. Yes, I know what a roguelite is. The difference here is that the game was insanely padded during my playtime and the gameplay wasn't engaging enough to make grinding enjoyable. Longer games do not equate to more fun.
2. I'm not a liberal looking down on this game for having sexual content. I said at the beginning that I love this kind of stuff and would easily recommend the Haydee games as the current pinnacle of tightly-designed sexy shooters.
3. There is no vendetta against eTIRUe here. I want to see this genre thrive which is why I criticized it. They seem to really enjoy what they do based on their Twitter so I'm cheering for their future endeavors. It's great that the game has received frequent updates as well. Good luck, eTIRUe!

Crawling Lab has some pretty nice models but the environments and ambience are severely lacking. Repetitive room clearing with next to no ammo even if it's all you spec into. The intent is for you to die and earn measly amounts of points to invest into upgrades, which wouldn't be an issue if the combat weren't so boring. You're supposed to think you're weak with how terrible starting sprint is but you can circumvent by strafing. Constantly having to restart by no real error of my own but because the game said I can't have any ammo is annoying. On top of this, your knife breaks so you're forced to take damage by punching until you die. Really unnecessarily wasteful of the player's time.

Haydee 2 retains the same aspects as the first Haydee but removes the platforming to what I believe is its detriment. The platforming should've been kept solely for the sake of shortcut optimization. There are maps this time but they aren't in your inventory, which isn't a problem necessarily since levels are well designed. My largest issue with Haydee 2 is that it leans more into horror but not enough and doesn't expand the enemy roster. There is a ton of potential for a horror-shooter focused on sex appeal to utilize nightmare fuel fetishes to make things extremely uncomfortable. There are creepy ideas in the lore but it didn't go far enough. I remember enjoying the music in the first Haydee and it's flat out fantastic here. Workshop support returns and contains a dodge feature that would've been awesome in the campaign but is ultimately unneeded. The additions of the shotgun and rifle (replacing the magnum) are much appreciated but have little demand considering the lack of enemy variety.

Niche sexy game with a fantastic design for a protagonist but the gameplay isn't for everyone. It's a hybrid between frustrating platformer and survival-horror (resource management & backtracking aspects). The workshop support is much appreciated and there's some pretty fun stuff out there. You need to play this like a schizophrenic to not get completely bodied. Expect anything.

It's just like old Flash games, short and sweet. Great music as well.

converted me to Islam

Extremely stylish point-and-click adventure game that I saw way back but never actually played until now. I loved it but it can be aggravating that a few items are jokes that have no usage besides hidden text. These two items are the extinguisher and soda, in case you plan on playing. Otherwise, wonderful little title with a lovely artstyle that perfectly captures the early 2000s.

I want to be happy that Klonoa is back but the pricing on this is ridiculous and the games feel off. The data gathering garbage as soon as you open the game is utter ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. This is a bundle of two singleplayer games, ♥♥♥♥ off. I swear the wind bullet had a little more reach in the original games than it does here with an absolutely pitiful range. It's possible to complete Lunatea's Veil but I have yet to replay Door to Phantomile. There was a stutter that could get very annoying in Lunatea's Veil mainly toward the end of the game. I might recommend this for $10 on a sale. Also, the OST DLC is a stupid program instead of just giving you the audio files.

I have a lot of nostalgia for the original Dead Island but trying to go back to these games after playing Dying Light is hell. They feel extremely clunky and broken. Attacks that seem dead on will whiff for no reason. Certain skills bug out half the time, there's a forced aim-assist that can't be turned off, and the game is annoyingly intended to be played multiplayer. There's a death timer so you have to wait if you get downed, even if your session is set to single player. Compound this with a borked damage multiplier from thrown weapons and you can get killed in one hit by something thrown by a zombie, having to wait 10 seconds to even die. Pick up Dying Light for like $10 on a sale and play it instead, improvement in every way.

I'm very conflicted with this because the base mechanics feel great but the level design and enemy spam sours the entire package. Pick it up on sale.
They implemented a system to let you climb on basically anything but there's very little reason to actually do so besides looking cool. You can even fling yourself off surfaces to go flying through the air and hang onto ceilings. This would open up a lot of really cool ideas for stealth but the levels don't do anything with it. Suppressors don't seem to make a difference and there are like 10 different kinds. I have yet to finish the campaign but every level except one felt exactly the same. Constantly having to sit behind cover and take potshots over long ranges while the game spawns maybe 20 enemies per encounter is so boring and aggravating. The level that takes place at night and is full of close-quarters combat is so much fun before you return to the same annoying, tedious ♥♥♥♥ from before.
The weapon selection is really fantastic and I love how many options there are. Any time you get tired of using the same guns, you can just snatch one off of a corpse or search for secrets. Shooting, reloading, and swapping attachments feels smooth but certain reticles are way too big. The ACOG sight has such horrible visibility, I can't stand using it.
I honestly bought this game for the zombies mode but it's the worst part. Same enemy spam problem as the campaign except with incredibly annoying zombies that travel at absurd speeds. Garbage suicide bomber types that no game has ever benefited from too. Zombies start getting ridiculously spongey after maybe the third objective. The secret weapons in the first map are dual pistols that don't even do significant damage by the time you get them. The balancing is terrible and there's no real room for experimentation because you only get the guns that the game gives you.