one of my friends works at a vet's office. they have one of those naked cats as kind of like their unofficial mascot, and she just roams around doing naked cat things.

but apparently what no one tells you about naked cats is that there's no fur to stop their buttholes from suction-cupping all the surfaces they sit on. so her office just makes their intern follow this cat around and clean up all its butt puckers off the glass.

Give This Rose
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To Every ♥♥♥♥♥♥

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Like any good story, this one has humble beginnings. A long time ago, 1946 to be exact, Truett Cathy opened a diner in Atlanta called The Dwarf Grill. The place was small, so the name fit. But Truett was an innovative businessman who served great food. So the business grew. Then about 15 years later - just as the burger fever began to grip the nation - Truett had a unique idea. Instead of a quarter pound of beef on a bun, why not substitute a plump, juicy, boneless breast of chicken? And thus, in the early 1960s, he introduced the original Chick-fil-AⓇ Chicken Sandwich. In 1967, the first Chick-fil-A Restaurant opened in Atlanta's Greenbriar Mall. And shortly thereafter, his chicken sandwich really took off. Today, millions of folks enjoy our original chicken sandwich, still cooked Truett's special way, hand-breaded in each restaurant. Every day. And it's our hope tat every meal, like this story, has a happy ending.

Say, would you ladies like to learn something interesting? You see, there's something called the "post-ejaculatory refractory period," which is the recovery phase after orgasm during which it is physiologically impossible for a man to have additional orgasms. But GET THIS- there is NO such recovery phase for when a male is introduced to a new female sexual partner immediately post-coitus. So, what I'm trying to say here is... well, I guess I'll have to dumb it down for you. If the five of us hung out, then, well... we would have a pretty good time ;)

Obviously I am aware of the existence of contractions. However, I choose not to use them, and you should do the same. A person whose speech is fraught with contractions is akin to a drunkard slurring his speech. For some reason, I am the only one who appreciates the beauty of the English language enough to enunciate it to its fullest extent. Also, by abstaining from my contractions and speaking clearly (and thoughtfully), my rate of speech becomes slower; hopefully slow enough for the average individual to keep up with me.