Hi, My name is Organ Snatcher but yall can call me "The Snatcha"
What do I snatch you ask? Well im for one above greed and enjoy stealing delicacies like little children's pet goldfish, whole grain flour, NyQuil, femboy booty and my personal favorite, Organs. People also commonly ask me "how did you come up with such an awefounding name and why are you so cute and awesome and am I smelling ground beef and cheetoh dust?" and to that I say Yes thank you for noticing. Well if you REALLY want to know then I have compiled a biography of my achievements throughout my time in realm 7. Feast your eyes.

After I had my sternum shattered and was asphyxiated by a mine cart while working as a child slaver in a Venezuelan Cobalt Mine my love once told me "Armenious, you are a ladies man. You should go out and be a gigolo for a group of young disabled women now that you have no sternum. Make me proud, baby." And soon, it will all come together like melting your horse down and turning it into glue and making a 2:1 scale of the World Trade Center Towers out of yarn, toothpicks and discarded aluminum cans. Unfortunately that didnt exactly work out in my favor so alas I set out on a journey.

Almost immediately after I had a change of heart and realized this whole thing was like the natural selection and its my job to be a honey bee on Black Tar heroin and pollinate all the flowers by steering into oncoming traffic going 200mph in a school zone with my raging boner (from the kids?) while on horse back. The horse in the end was splattered like a work of modern art and eventually turned into another bottle of Elmer's Glue. I had good times with that horse, in fact too good of times. Me and my buddy would regularly have intercourse with the horse back when I lived in Enumclaw Washington, but one day he got egregiously ♥♥♥♥♥♥ in the ass to death and after that I halted my actions out of respect for Kenny.

Unfortunately, I ran into a bit of a bump, a bump like that said honey bee getting his penis torn off by a deranged homicidal 16 year old polish kid with a BB gun he brought to school who got his personality from Jared Letos Joker. Now it is time to continue my quest to depositing the goods in the assortments of gay little dandelions.

Ever since I was a kid my grandma always showed a specific liking to me like she would always be so touchy with me and suggest things for us to do in our "alone time" Speed fast forward I was 15 and my grandma was in her 40's one day my parents dropped me off on at my grandma's. She led me to her bedroom to "Show me her new outfit" little did I know the "outfit" she meant was lingerie VERY REVEALING lingerie. Things get messy and we end up naked her bed. This little fling turned into an every day thing. Whenever I would come back to her house it was just a sex and cuddle butt naked until my parents get there. After that I ended up marrying this girl that my family knew but ended up meeting up with my grandma in secret and if we werent able to text we would sext. Now me and my wife ended up divorcing but I dont care why go across town when you can go across the hall?

But lets not talk about the good times as thus it is my greatest obstacles that define my character is it not? I saw some neckbeard on Twitter tossing around the notion that Nobara's nipples didn't have a flawless shade of pink, and were dark brown. Yes, I know, I had to do a double take too. It's like claiming the Earth is flatter than the pulse of my deceased midget ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. This neckbeard seemed to be operating on a wavelength that's completely out of sync with human beings capable of logical thought. I mean, how do you not see that Nobara is a goddess among mortals and thus her nipples must have a flawless shade of pink to the point you'd wish you were reborn as a baby and sucked on those flawless juicy nipples dripping divine milk with its unparalleled richness and sumptuous creaminess and boasting a velvety smooth texture that transcends reality, delivering an ethereal experience. It's like denying that the sky is blue or that my penis isn't hard right now as I write this. I propose that we hunt him down and wack his head with our body pillows. Who's in on this?

But I digress, and I pondered for hours thinking. Then... it occured to me; that I'm being not quite assertive enough with my rampage of erectile probing and artificial insemination of almond milk, so its time to kick it up a notch or seven.

As Heinz Lammerding once said, "♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ get money no funny" and I just think hes truly inspiring. I wish I was as brave as he was in unit 731, but im merely me. A Deity amongst men yes, but not quite Nobara (Nobara is slang for perfect). I need to reach greater heights than before.

"Would Satan be proud?" Maybe if I was a Jew. Even though I've hit hard times, I will not give up to spread the corruption across the land of Andrew Jackson, and I will name all of my children George. Excellent the 7th.

Its back to the normal for me. Being mister nice dude with my ex partners even if I want to abuse them like my great granpappy would thundercunt his 7 Bolivian wives across the room if dinner was cold.

Now I spend my days retired and rich. I like to watch Midgets solve intense math equations on hard to reach whiteboards while nude in my free time. One of them has actually died form this labor, but you know what they say "5 second rule". I used the last of her body to my fullest gratification to make the most value out of it, and boy let me tell you that got me hooked. I now have countless midget wives working for me like im Saint Nicholas. But I digress.

Inspiring entrepreneur and clothing manufacturer
-Snatcha



Well... Perhaps