"count-strike: global offensive?
more like
♥♥♥-strike: global objection"

woodfall we already have a janitor

hey I just graduated and heard you were moving up the cooperate ladder! I just graduated from DeVry University with a multimedia arts degree (summa ♥♥♥ laude) and have had a few internships with prestigious fortune 500 companies. I have also been praised for my punctuality. I am willing to send resume over steam. Thanks

You're not even steam level 5. when are your achievements aren't just for booting up the game, then we'll talk

I realize you're loathe to be in charge of decisions, even something so low-risk as the theme of a meal, which we eat every ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ day of every week for the last 13 years. And when we were both fully employed and you worked long hours, and then not-any-longer-than-me hours, I let it slide for about oh, I dunno, A DECADE, give or take.
But then we moved, and I have a job, and you don't. You're a house-husband. Which means you have very few jobs: Clean up the house, which is easy because we're both neat and our home is tiny; empty the dishwasher and wash the towels on occasion. AND ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ PICK UP THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ GROCERIES AND GOD FORBID COOK SOMETHING. ANYTHING. EXCEPT HOT DOGS, YOU LAZY ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

My snafu has been rused and coaxed