Ord1n2l's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked Dec 7, 2018 @ 7:41am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 8:49am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 7:34am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 7:23am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 10:20pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 11:36pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked Feb 16, 2019 @ 12:29am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked Feb 19, 2019 @ 7:59am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked Aug 31, 2021 @ 11:56am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked Aug 4, 2021 @ 11:33am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked Mar 15, 2019 @ 11:23pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked Feb 19, 2019 @ 7:08am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 7:19am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 11:12pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 6:14am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked Dec 7, 2018 @ 7:36am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 6:59am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked Feb 16, 2019 @ 12:37am

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked Sep 2, 2021 @ 9:03am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 10:45pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked Feb 19, 2019 @ 7:50am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked Dec 7, 2018 @ 7:39am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked Feb 15, 2019 @ 10:15pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 6:06am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 5:46am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked Dec 7, 2018 @ 7:36am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 8:34am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked Dec 8, 2018 @ 12:47am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 5:44am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 6:54am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked Mar 15, 2019 @ 11:23pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked Aug 4, 2021 @ 11:52am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked Aug 7, 2021 @ 4:33am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked Aug 30, 2021 @ 11:29am

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked Sep 2, 2021 @ 9:50am

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.

Unlocked Feb 20, 2019 @ 7:44am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked Aug 5, 2021 @ 8:51am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked Aug 30, 2021 @ 9:38am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked Aug 30, 2021 @ 11:25am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked Feb 14, 2019 @ 7:03am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

11 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

1 / 3

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

12 / 30

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

1 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30