Darkmasterix » Games » POSTAL 2 Stats

Playtime past 2 weeks:
0h

View global achievement stats
You must be logged in to compare these stats to your own
69 of 89 (78%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 6:54am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 1:08pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 7:08am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Unlocked Oct 27, 2019 @ 9:30pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 6:27am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Unlocked Nov 15, 2019 @ 11:02am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Unlocked Oct 17, 2017 @ 10:26am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Unlocked Mar 10, 2019 @ 7:24am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Unlocked Mar 10, 2019 @ 8:18am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Unlocked Oct 27, 2019 @ 10:55pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Unlocked Oct 28, 2019 @ 5:05pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Unlocked Nov 7, 2019 @ 6:45am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 9:55am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 10:10am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Unlocked Dec 19, 2017 @ 12:43pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Unlocked Jan 27, 2020 @ 10:48pm

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
Unlocked Jan 27, 2020 @ 11:50pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Unlocked Nov 1, 2019 @ 3:44pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Unlocked Nov 4, 2017 @ 5:20am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Unlocked Oct 28, 2019 @ 8:27am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 11:24am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Unlocked Nov 13, 2019 @ 10:10am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Unlocked Aug 21, 2018 @ 7:39pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 1:49pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Unlocked Mar 10, 2019 @ 7:42am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Unlocked Jan 27, 2020 @ 10:38pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 6:38am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Unlocked Nov 11, 2017 @ 4:29am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Unlocked Nov 7, 2019 @ 6:47am

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 9:52am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked Jan 8, 2022 @ 9:28pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Unlocked Jan 27, 2020 @ 11:32pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Unlocked Apr 24, 2023 @ 7:47pm

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Unlocked Nov 12, 2021 @ 6:03am

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Unlocked Jan 28, 2020 @ 12:05am

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Unlocked Dec 4, 2021 @ 6:20pm

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 9:58am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 10:37am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 9:25am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Unlocked Oct 27, 2019 @ 10:35pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Unlocked Oct 17, 2017 @ 6:24am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Unlocked Nov 1, 2019 @ 1:27pm

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked Jan 8, 2022 @ 9:37pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Unlocked Jan 27, 2020 @ 10:30pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Unlocked Oct 31, 2016 @ 6:51am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Unlocked Dec 19, 2017 @ 12:43pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Unlocked Apr 23, 2023 @ 8:18pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Unlocked Oct 28, 2016 @ 9:22pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Unlocked Nov 3, 2017 @ 4:42am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Unlocked Nov 4, 2017 @ 10:00pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Unlocked Dec 19, 2017 @ 12:43pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.
Unlocked Mar 10, 2019 @ 7:55am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 10:51am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Unlocked Nov 23, 2021 @ 12:46pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Unlocked Nov 7, 2019 @ 6:41am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 10:18am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Unlocked Nov 13, 2019 @ 10:04am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Unlocked Oct 17, 2017 @ 10:15am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Unlocked Dec 4, 2021 @ 5:49pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Unlocked Jan 25, 2022 @ 5:29pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Unlocked Dec 19, 2017 @ 12:43pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 9:58am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Unlocked Dec 21, 2018 @ 5:00pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Unlocked Dec 22, 2018 @ 1:40pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Unlocked Nov 8, 2019 @ 7:25pm

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.
Unlocked Dec 21, 2018 @ 4:54pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Unlocked Dec 22, 2018 @ 1:34pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
Unlocked Nov 15, 2019 @ 10:49am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Unlocked Nov 3, 2017 @ 4:53am



Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
449 / 5,000

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
+8

8 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked