Darren Slnader:

He doesn't have a job
He need to hit the gym
He smells like barbecue and my grandmas attic
He smokes weed and eats wings everyday
He gambles on ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ everyday
He got about $20 in his bank account
He gets no ♥♥♥♥♥ from his gf
He talks to every person on the street
He argues about putting on everyone on to music
He loves to brag about being the best awper but he bottom frags