Professional Players. Unprofessional Results.

CERTIFIED SKILL ISSUES™

Officially licensed to disappoint since 2026.

Welcome to Certified Skill Issues, the world's least qualified Counter-Strike organization.

We are a highly trained team of professionals dedicated to proving that expensive inventories and actual gaming skills are completely unrelated.

OUR SPECIALTIES

- Missing stationary targets.
- Flashing teammates with surgical precision.
- Planting the bomb and immediately abandoning the site.
- Buying AWP just to donate it to the enemy team.
- Turning a 12-3 lead into a historical disaster.
- Sharing one brain cell between five players.

OFFICIAL TEAM STATISTICS

Major Championships: 0
Successful Strategies: Classified
Team Coordination: Not Found
Average IQ: Under Investigation
Confidence: Unreasonably High
Expensive Skins: Absolutely
Game Sense: Sold Separately
Excuses: Unlimited

OUR PHILOSOPHY

We don't believe in losing.

We believe in giving our opponents an opportunity to experience happiness.

Every missed shot is a warning shot.
Every failed clutch is a learning experience.
Every team flash is an internal performance review.

And every defeat is simply another successful donation of ELO.

MEMBERSHIP REQUIREMENTS

- Own at least one skin worth more than your actual skill.
- Blame the servers at least once per match.
- Say "He's one HP" regardless of damage dealt.
- Have complete confidence in absolutely terrible decisions.
- Remember that teamwork is optional, but complaining is mandatory.

OUR MOTTO

"We don't have skill issues. We ARE the skill issue."

Certified Skill Issues™
Making enemies look professional since 2026.

Management has confirmed that none of our players are currently under investigation for being good at the game.

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POPULAR DISCUSSIONS

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RECENT ANNOUNCEMENTS

[OFFICIAL] Investigation #001 - Missing ELO

October 31 - ༶KARAS༶ | 0 Comments

CASE FILE #001: MISSING ELO

Department: Competitive Integrity
Status: UNDER INVESTIGATION
Priority: CRITICAL
Suspects: Everyone except us

INCIDENT REPORT

Certified Skill Issues™ has officially launched an investigation into the mysterious disappearance of our competitive rating.

After reviewing several matches, management has concluded that our players are completely innocent.

The investigation continues.

PRIMARY SUSPECTS

01. THE SERVERS
Our shots clearly connected. Reality disagreed.

02. OUR TEAMMATES
Suspiciously present during every defeat.

03. THE ENEMY TEAM
Unreasonably skilled. Possibly using their monitors.

04. VALVE
Continues matching us against people who know how to play.

05. OUR OWN SKILL
Investigation suspended. No evidence of its existence was found.

OFFICIAL FINDINGS

ELO Recovered: 0
Excuses Submitted: 147
Players Taking Responsibility: 0
Management Confidence: 100%

PUBLIC STATEMENT

"We have thoroughly investigated ourselves and found no evidence of wrongdoing."

All members are encouraged to submit additional excuses in the comments.

Certified Skill Issues™
Professional Players. Unprofessional Results.

UPDATE: We lost another match during the investigation.

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Certified Skill Issues reviews

"We review games so you don't have to. Our qualifications? None. Our confidence? Unlimited. Our gaming skills? Under investigation. Certified Skill Issues™"

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