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RECENT ANNOUNCEMENTS

More Competitors, Uncertain Future

July 17, 2016 - tonyl | 0 Comments

Be on the lookout Stallions - Allen's Pizzeria off of Watson Blvd is gearing up for a faceoff of the century. Their new stone-baked technology and techniques for efficient and consistent production are sneaking up behind our Easy Bake Oven equipment and reheat-with-microwave tactic.

I am sorry to inform the Pizza Stallion fanbase and loyal customers that we are finding ourselves under fire, and are in dire need of financial assistance. Please forward all future paychecks, whether you are an employee of a Pizza Stallion location or not, to our manager's personal checking account through Suntrust at account number: 465839. If necessary, scratch out the recipiant's name and respectfully replace it with "Tony Emilio Lamboney."

Thank you for your patience and consideration concerning our pizza joint. Stay tuned for more updates on the sabotage of Allen's Stone-Baked Pizzeria.

Update Concerning Eradicated Competition

June 27, 2016 - tonyl | 0 Comments

To all employees/indentured servants,

Thank you for your cooperation and persistent effort in the fight against our most recent threat, Pizza Hut. I am proud to announce the utter annihalation of this thorn in our (profits') backsides that would have never come to fruition without your help.

As a token of graditude and appreciaton from our management team, a sacrificial slice of our very finest twenty-inch five-cheese stuffed crust stone-baked supreme pizza from downtown, presented in a hand-crafted maplewood shadowbox from our finest carpenters, will be delivered to each of our managers. For the viewing pleasure of our employees, each sacred slice of pizza in its shadowbox will be on display on each manager's front door, secured with and only with certified pizza pattern duct tape. If one brave employee dares to lay a finger on such a pizza presentation, a small fine will be deducted from the employee's next paycheck.

Again, thank you all for your dedication and passion for The Pizza Stallion. We sincerely hope that this level of a reward satisfies the deep desire to demonstrate passionate appreciation for pizza.

- Tony Lamboney