What the F**K does Min mean?

Have you seen a person with characteristics so amazing that you recognize them only by said trait? If so, this is the place for you! If not, you have not been enlightened by the ways of the Min.

Group Ranks:
Min-- The starting position, the fact that he's so normal makes him an outcast.
Bald Min-- This Min has shaved his head, and has yet to earn any girth. He is not always around, but when he is, this Min is there for a good time.
Fat Min-- A slightly heftier Min. Full of spunk (and Twinkies).
Fatter Min-- Much girthier than Fat Min. He seems to be developing a rugged Southern Accent.
Fattest Min-- The pinnacle of Min weight. His hefty stature has erased his accent, but has made him a more enlightened Min. When his fellow Min leave him, he evolves into the all mighty Sad Min.
Sad Min-- There comes a time in every Fattest Min's life when it becomes too difficult to join his fellow Min in a stroll across his domain. As he sits perched apon his noble throne, he appears depressed. It is this depression which makes him value his fellow Min brothers. It is here where true enlightenment is reached.

Supplies:
Every Min is required a select handfull of essential possessions. The first on the list is the communal pair of Min Shorts. Every day, these sacred shorts are passed down the ranks, as a sign of acceptance. Next on the list is a comb. This comb will not be used, however. It will be neglected every morning, as a true Min knows that the less he cares of his apperance, the closer he will become to Min Enlightenment. With these two essential steps, you too can join the ranks of the Min Dynasty.