I don't feel like a man but a loser.

[Tiberius]

I should know better at my age and borderline know that I am just being stupid about this.
But since I injured me knee and permanently damaged my ligament (which obviously progresses over years), I was not allowed to join even the army reserves, despite me being a what people call " hacker " and would not have been in any physical demanding job anyway.

But apparently for them this is enough to not take me.

Now I feel like a complete loser, not a man, as I am not even " capable " to fight or defend my home anymore. Sure this sounds like right out of an 1940s movie, but this was always something I was capable of, now I regret I did not really join for reserve duty when I was younger and did not have this injury...

I feel so incapable now. No idea why.

I mean, maybe in times of war they would draft me anyway, because otherwise I am fit, strong, I can also run, but avoid long runs and so on.

What is your take on this? Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media? Is my disappointment and concern rooted in reasonable ground ? Help me out here, this drags me a lot more down thant it should, I did not expect that.

[Tabun Gas]

Sounds like your value in yourself isn't your own but a product of some weird media ♥♥♥♥ yes.

[Tiberius]

Originally posted by Lil Credit Card:

Sounds like your value in yourself isn't your own but a product of some weird media ♥♥♥♥ yes.

So how do I get rid of this.

[Tabun Gas]

Originally posted by Tiberius:

Originally posted by Lil Credit Card:

Sounds like your value in yourself isn't your own but a product of some weird media ♥♥♥♥ yes.

So how do I get rid of this.

I'd say look at the guys in worse situations and see how they remain manly and charming. Lot of vets end up in wheelchairs or worse and it don't make them less of men.

[Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...]

if you feel the need to serve look in your local community and see what you can help it with. you could take that drive and change people's lives and it may give you a sense of accomplishment. i hope you find peace with this and don't feel guilty. a man is more than the sum of his parts.

[Tiberius]

Originally posted by Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...:

if you feel the need to serve look in your local community and see what you can help it with. you could take that drive and change people's lives and it may give you a sense of accomplishment. i hope you find peace with this and don't feel guilty. a man is more than the sum of his parts.

Nah, thats not the same at all.

[Lunar Fang]

Originally posted by Tiberius:

Originally posted by Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...:

if you feel the need to serve look in your local community and see what you can help it with. you could take that drive and change people's lives and it may give you a sense of accomplishment. i hope you find peace with this and don't feel guilty. a man is more than the sum of his parts.

Nah, thats not the same at all.

I had the same thoughts. Always felt like I should of went into the military, always regretted not doing it, so I've walked in your shoes for a long time, still gets me sometimes, like I missed my calling.

[76561199723811215]

Originally posted by Tiberius:

Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media?

Basically this. Soldiers are not heroes. They are fools. Your self image and the collapse of it are caused by people who told you what you need to be. But you can shake that off if you want to. Not saying that's easy, you'll have to work on it. Maybe read some self help books or something like that. Just saying it's your conditioning which makes you feel like this, but that's all it is, conditioning.

[Tiberius]

Originally posted by ghost:

Originally posted by Tiberius:

Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media?

Basically this. Soldiers are not heroes. They are fools. Your self image and the collapse of it are caused by people who told you what you need to be. But you can shake that off if you want to. Not saying that's easy, you'll have to work on it. Maybe read some self help books or something like that. Just saying it's your conditioning which makes you feel like this, but that's all it is, conditioning.

You are right and basically every soldier told me exactly this... I even was in the army for a few weeks when I was 18 but left because it sucked. No idea what is wrong with me. Probably years of being conditioned a wrong image of what a man should be.

[TGC> The Games Collector]

Originally posted by Tiberius:

What is your take on this? Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media?

Yes, especially if you think the only way you can make yourself useful is as cannon fodder, 100%.

[Tiberius]

Originally posted by TGC> The Games Collector:

Originally posted by Tiberius:

What is your take on this? Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media?

Yes, especially if you think the only way you can make yourself useful is as cannon fodder, 100%.

For me its not about being useful. I think I am already very useful for my family, at work and so on.
Its more like being CAPABLE to DEFEND my family and country against a violent invader when it comes down to it, let that be as a cyber security specialist or a medic or what not, but them just generally rejecting me like this, makes me feel old and incapable. If that makes sense.

[76561199723811215]

Oh and another thing. No matter the cause, the way you feel is still real, still valid. Why do you say it drags you down "more than it should"?

See if you can be with it, just let it be there, instead of seeing it as a problem you need to solve. You could even try to go towards it, REALLY feel it, contemplate on it. You might find that helps you a lot more than trying to make it go away.

[someone]

you’re alright boah

[Evil Masses]

What do the rest of your friends on Steam think of this answer? I personally am the kind of person who is straight forward, if I think something is a problem I will just say so. Even if someone is lying to me I will simply repeat word for word what they said to the best of my memory, and if it is untrue, how am I supposed to know one way or the other other than blind trust and simply their word that they are telling the truth? Must be true. That is why I'm not a paranoid person.

[NW/RL]

Originally posted by Tiberius:

What is your take on this? Am I a complete fool who is just indoctrinated by military media?

Yes, at least for anyone who enters the military on grounds that aren't complete desperation. From what little of yourself you've described, you sound competent in other areas of life. Pursue those

[$2 Hero]

Join the police academy.