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As I mentioned in an edit in an earlier post, you train your own brain.
And this includes giving you the feelings associated with the experience. The brain likes to predict everything and prepares itself for those same experiences and feelings, so by staying more on the positive side of things, you'll lose reasons to become upset or angry and see fun more often.
For example in PVP, you should try watching what your opponent does right and wrong more.
"He missed!"
"I didn't expect that. Well played."
Not like:
"I screwed up. I screwed up again." <-- focus on you + negative, not good.
Also look at your own achievements, don't ignore them and remain quiet in mind about it.
"I barely escaped that hit. Good call."
"Wow."
Not like:
"I nearly screwed up my game." <--- too negative.
Don't reward the brain when feeling negative or angry (take a break, go outside, drink water, (10 minutes is enough). Try to actively think of something entirely different, even if it is just cars driving by or parked in the parking spots.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinforcement
You can train yourself to see more positivity in experience and feel more positive about the experiences. In the end you'll feel good automatically, without the need to be conscious about it.
Nothing, just a low tier bait attempt, and considering he has a thread calling out the mods continually banning him well... i think we have our smoking gun.
Back on the topic of the thread though:
OP, if you could list what other games you and your friends play together it might kind of help give me an idea of what else to recommend. Finding games that have an almost 'fun through dying' approach that aren't meant to be taken seriously or where the stakes are so low that death literally doesn't matter might be a good place to start. The more you train your brain to recognize that a fail state isn't necessarily always a bad thing, or even something that's 'your fault', the better you'll be able to handle losses without lashing out.
I kind of had a similar issue back when I played League of Legends. I was... decent... Could hit maybe mid silver most seasons playing solo back before the champ roster could populate a small island nation by itself. When I did play with friends, I had one friend who would constantly blame me for the losses, anything that went wrong in a match it was for something I did. Their ADC got fed? I wasn't playing agressive enough and getting enough kills (ironically enough, my play habits actually were just more well in tune with higher elo where the focus was on zoning and denying the enemy the opportunity to farm gold rather than just making it a kill lane). He gets killed for being out of position? I should have been there with him. He makes the agressive call to go for an objective and I recognize the enemy is probably there, my fault for... you get the picture.
There were other issues with the friendship overall, as the guy was a bit of a narcissist and I ended up delegated as his personal emotional punching bag to make himself feel better, partly due to my own knack for self-depricating humor and just generally being pretty passive and not really taking ♥♥♥♥ personally to begin with. Eventually I got sick of it, blew up on him during a group call mid match, and just dropped out of the match and left the call. Unsurprisingly, I no longer have any contact with the guy, and eventually he ended up burning bridges with the rest of the group after that too.
In my case it was a mix of the game being a bad fit since so much could go wrong outside your control and there's nothing you could do which frustrated me to no end, and I was playing with a severely toxic individual that tried to make everything that went wrong my fault.
I guess this is just a long way to say the answer might be... complicated... but it's not something that can't be fixed
Deep Rock Galactic, Helldivers 2, and Lethal Company to name a few.
Gotcha, dont have much experience with Helldivers and kinda know the jist of DRG, but do you find these feelings popping up with Lethal as much?
Eh, I haven't played it as much anymore probably due to my fear of making a mistake in it in general. DRG is about the only one I'd prolly feel comfy playing since HD2's nerfing backlash really killing my mood to play it.
Honestly it's hella fun. Maybe try playing some more of it. Death really doesn't mean much since you basically just have to wait until your friends get back to the ship and leave or end up dead themselves, and you just lose whatever items you have gathered from that run and maybe some money, but most runs are pretty self contained so it's more just fun for the experience.
Stay calm and do nothing. Your confusion will soon be eased.