Why cant I create a lobby or join my friend's?

[U got this, bro.]

The "host lobby" is grayed out when I try to make one and when I try to join my friend's it says "no licenses" and throws me out.

Why.

[James3157]

At least one of the explanations for this that I looked up from an AI overview says "If you are unable to access multiplayer in Age of Empires II: Definitive Edition without a license, it means you do not have a valid copy of the game and therefore cannot play online multiplayer matches; you need to purchase the game to access its full features including online multiplayer." There are number of other possible explanations behind this as well such as not being allowed to play against a friend on HD from DE because they are not compatible, but check your account by verifying that you are logged into the correct account that owns the game license, you cannot play AoE II: DE multiplayer without a license, and you need to have purchased a copy of the game with a valid licence. Apparently you are not supposed to buy AoE II: DE from a key reseller either according to this reddit link I looked up from someone named TheElomoin in one of the comments below, but if even just one of players purchased CD keys from a reseller then that could potentially result in an error resulting in multiplayer not being allowed to launch. https://www.reddit.com/r/aoe2/comments/17suxqh/cant_play_mp_with_friend/

[James3157]

As for the other part with "host lobby" being grayed out I cannot explain that part entirely, but maybe it is because you have not selected the option of "friends" or "everyone"?