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watching a speedrun to beat the game will provide help like this:
7% effectiveness by showing a strong weapon
93% effectiveness by watching the speedrunner doing all the stuff
If the weapon has a high strength requirement, use it two-handed to further save on points.
Early weapon upgrades are easier to do with weapons using twinkling titanite, demon titanite (if you look up locations), and dragon scale.
Getting either lightning +5, chaos +5 or +15 normal weapons isn't too bad for experienced players. But likely impossible for new players considering locations of slabs and embers.
As for the weapon, as long as it fufills these requirements, it doesn't matter too much. But better damage/DPS is preferred.
Examples pure damage, start to late game:
Black knight halberd (Start-ish)
Black knight sword (Start)
Black knight greataxe (mid to late)
Black knight greatsword (Start)
Obsidian greatsword (Late)
Silver Knight Straight Sowrd (mid)
Silver knight spear (mid)
Gravelord sword (start, with know-how)
Examples split:
Blacksmith Giant hammer (Mid - NPC only matters if you plan to stay in NG)
Queelaag's furysword (mid)
Demons spear (Start to mid)
Examples for lightning or chaos:
Reinforced club
Battle axe or Gargoyle tail axe
Greataxe
Gargoyle halberd
Great club
Flamberge
Zweihander (Yes; the giant dad is actually a decently optimized build. Try instead to use mask of mother/child and accept mid-rolling).
^Most of these weapons are generally high AR as queelag's furysword is better than the faster weapons alternatives, such as lightning or chaos falchion.
Any weapon on this list can carry you through NG with minimum stats to wield two-handed, 49 vitality, and 40 endurance. Afterwards, just branch into your magic, faith or quality build.
If the weapon is easily wielded 1-handed, then I suggest upgrading the silver knight shield when you get it in anor londo if you are a shield user.
My personal favorite is the gravelord sword. It can be reached within 2 minutes of reaching firelink and has no RNG like black knight halberd. The requirements are low in comparison to BKH. Fun fact: Before BKH the gravelord sword was used for speedruns.
If you look up how to get the gravelord sword, remember that you can despawn skeletons by going to the main menu...
The same build-strategy can generally be used in the other souls games, through the upgrade materials is usually barred behind zones and their bosses. My favorite DS3 weapon is currently the black knight sword for its preserverence weapon art, twinkling upgrade, and high base damage :)
TLDR; the weapon does make the game easier, in my opinion.
So, I'm gonna agree with your friend, I wouldn't say he ruined his playthrough.